Letters to a Judge
by Kamaete
Summary: Being a Judge, Sasuke can expect odd letters and cases. As Sasuke, he can expect innocent convicts to befriend him, bonding with his brother, cooking Italian dishes, and dark memories coming to life. DARK. ¡UNDER RECONSTRUCTION!
1. Letters

**.:** Letters **:: **To **:: **The **:: **Judge **::**

By

**[A/N: Basic Information:: **

**Words**: 7,897

**Warnings:: **(for entire story) cursing, pedophilia, non-consensual sex, rape, under aged sex, graphic sexual scenes, drug misuse, explicit torture scenes (really explicit), psychological/emotional/physical torture, angst, mentions of murder, death, suicide, contemplation of suicide, masochism, sadism, controversial issues, stands on ideas, crappy attempt at humor, weird formatting, extensive use of the symbols(separated by a semicolon): --; (); …; :: ; and other 'bad' and 'dark' things.

**Some Scenes May Be Interpreted As the Following:** incest (only if you squint, it's just a bonding moment, anyways, unless you want it to be), some 'gay' feelings (again, only if you squint, it was going to be more, but it got way to long).

**Warnings for Part One:: **cursing, sexual content, mention of murder, rape, and death, under aged non-consensual sex, violence, prisons, bad grammar. Attempt at bad humor.

**Most Content Not Suitable For the Immature.**

**Do Not Read if Easily Sickened** (It gets bad real fast)

**Note:** This was supposed to be thirteen pages, one part, really short, PWP. Why must the angst get me? Why?

**Edit:** Some breaks to show time, hopefully fixed, a bit better

**Disclaimer:: **(for entire story) I Don't own Naruto© which belongs to Masashi Kishimoto. If this fic is any example, they'd kill me if I owned them.**]**

.: Premier :: Fois :.

.: Letters :.

How the Hell Sasuke became a judge, he'd never know. Why he became a judge was pretty easy--he didn't want to go into the police force like his brother and father, and grandfather, and great grandfather, and… well, etcetera. So he went to law school, and got his degrees, and, eventually, he found himself here, at his house, just coming home from judging a relatively annoying case. Stupid arsonist, catching himself in the fire.

In his hands was a small pile of mail. Carefully, he sorted through them. He put the bills in one pile, a letter from his mother and brother in another pile. His father's letter was thrown in the trash. The shopping coupons were also thrown away. There was three other letters, from the local prison. That irked him. It was an odd feeling, an odd sensation, whenever he got what might as well be described as fan mail from people he had sent to prison. Well, not entirely him, the lawyers and jury did more than he did. He just called the shots from his bench, mostly. The mail he received was interesting enough, in the annoyingness.

He'd received fourteen different letters--in the past four months, mind you--from people he'd recently judged the cases of. Twelve of them were, creepy enough, love letters. Out of the twelve of them, three were from women. Nine of them were from men, he wasn't altogether sure were gay. He couldn't say if they thought he was a woman--he hated to admit it, but his facial features did come off as a little feminine. Though his shoulders where a bit too broad, his hips too narrow, he lacked the curves a woman should have, the soft lines, and round flesh a woman was usually characterized as having. He had a grace, a sweeping movement that was seen as aristocratic wealth and background, but more commonly seen as another feminine trait. His voice, however, wasn't soft and high and feminine, though. And he'd spoken words through all the trials. His voice was soft, it was a trait he'd acquired, seeing as he spent much time when he was a child with soft spoken, yet stern Itachi. Yet it was deep enough, he guessed.

Reluctantly, he grabbed the five letters addressed to him and sat in a chair in his living room. He settled himself down, before stretching his arms and opened the first letter, from his mother. He scanned its contents and let a sad almost smile pass onto his lips before he squished it off. His mother seemed to be doing well. She wrote that his father was sorry, and that she knew he threw away his letter--like he always did(there was a slight bit of disappointment or resignation there)--but could he at least communicate with his father somehow? And that his father's birthday was coming up, would he like to come over for dinner on that date? His father would be out of town for something or other, and she was cooking his favorite! More pleasantries and wishes were given and the letter was signed Mikoto Uchiha with the careful, restrained hand she has.

He carefully folded the letter and placed it down, then picked up his brother's letter and opened it. 'Dear Foolish Little Brother,' it started, the way it usually does. Although, Sasuke suspected a little bit of amusement here. Some more about mother wanting him to respond to father, a little understanding as to why Sasuke didn't _want_ to respond to father, some condescending brother crap about letting go of foolish ideals and grudges--the hypocrite! _He_ wasn't talking to father either, dammit!--and then more drabble on the birthday. The letters from his brother were short, annoying, and usually made him feel anger, indignation, sadness, loneliness, or just foolish. Usually a combination of them all. He'd continue reading them, though, because his brother was his brother and life wouldn't be the same without him. The letter was signed, 'Your Amused Brother.' Like it usually did.

The other letters he was wary of opening, most of the letters from the prison had horrible, ugly, disgusting grammar that made him twitch. He did, though. The first he opened, he almost threw away. He could recognize the handwriting as a pedophile snake whose case he'd judged over three months ago. The case had been unnerving for him, partly because the tall, pale, long haired man was being accused of being a pedophile--and he had a grudge against them--and partly because the said long haired man was staring at him throughout the trial with snake like eyes; not blinking, and almost hypnotizing him like a snake would to its prey, a familiar stare he'd felt when he was a child.

A brief scan had him wanting to get a restraining order, not so much because of what he said, but because of the man who'd wrote it, and the _detail_ he wrote it in. And the grammar wasn't bad so he couldn't be distracted by that. Orochimaru was one of the men who knew he was a man. Although, in his eyes, he was more a boy on the cusp of manhood--he did look young, and the fine features may lead to being either effeminate or young. However, this was just more proof that Orochimaru needed to stay behind bars. He carefully folded the paper and put it next to the other letters. Later, he'd send it to the lawyer or something who prosecuted his case, a growing pile of evidence. He was of legal age, but the way the letters where written made it obvious the man looked at him as if he were younger. The thought made shivers spiral up his spinal column, and he shook his arms out.

The second letter, when he opened it, was from a woman who was not in prison. Surprisingly. She was in a mental hospital for rehab. Her lawyer had an easy time convincing the jury that she had acted without thought, under plea of insanity. She was eyeing him through out the trial with hungry, slightly feverish eyes. And her hair cut was horrid, an uneven balance of long a short red strands that almost but not quite resembled his own hair cut. She viewed him as nothing more than a man. An over testosterone charged man from a romance novel, but a man non-the-less. He would also, probably get a restraining order against her as well. She was obsessive and obstinate, and really, really aggressive. He folded her letter and put it next to Orochimaru's.

He opened the last letter and felt his spirits rise, just a little bit. This letter was from a man who had wanted no more then a non partial person to talk or vent to when he had written. Some part of Sasuke was--not happy, but content--that he'd been chosen as the correspondent. The man was not guilty. Sasuke was sure of that, yet he had no power once the jury came to a conclusion, and their conclusion was that he was guilty.

Naruto Uzumaki.

His father was a great man, but his brother and his mother were more often than not casting their images unto him. That was all the jury could see, the prosecutor could see, and probably the lawyers as well. The man hadn't even raised an eyebrow, or protested at the verdict. Many saw this as an admission of his guilt. Sasuke saw it for the resignation it was. When the man had first written, Sasuke was surprised at the normality of the letter. His letter stood out in it's awkward: 'uhm… SO, I don't know if you're going to read this, throw it away, or be wary of whether or not it's true. You might even, uhm, decide to call the Looney bin on me, because who in there right mind would write to you of all people the way I am, right? But I guess I just need _someone_ to talk to, even if you never respond, or it's only an illusion…' among all the, 'When I get out here, your so out of this life, man!'s and, 'I can't believe how relieved I am you put me here! I probably would have done it again!'s and 'God, you were so beautiful, I fell in love! I can't help but imagine those lips on me as I touch myself,'s. It was innocent in it's need, and it held no disillusion of who he was to this man. Just a person to whom he could feel a strange connection to.

That's why Sasuke took the time to read and respond to the letter. The first letter he had responded to with a simple, 'Hn. Usurotonkachi.' It was quick, and hopefully the idiot got it. And he did.

The week before he had read that letter was a stupid week. He had tried reconciling with his father, for his mother's sake, and they ended up yelling at each other as soon as his mother left to get drinks. Of course, Sasuke started yelling first. His father was always so condescending, disapproving. They were trying to reach a compromise, what right did he have to bring up his disappointments in Sasuke's life? How could he just sit there and still--_still--_compare him to his brother with a blasé attitude?!

His mother looked at him with a sad resigned countenance. Like he had failed her as well, as he walked--stormed--ran--_fled_--out of the house and slammed the door to his car and drove away. His brother had merely laughed and called him 'foolish,' as he lay in the hospital bed because of an incident at his work. His neighbor had loud, unfettered, probably kinky sex with his long time partner in a mocking way as he sat, alone, in his dark house. Shivering because the heater broke again.

Then he received the letter . 'usurutonkachi?! What the hell does that mean, Judge?! I know it's not nice, you jerk!' And everything was almost… not right, it wasn't right. Not with his father scorning him, and his brother in the hospital, and his mother slowly fading. But it was better. So he read the letter and he responded to the questions, more often then not just writing the sentence over and then adding 'ahou,' or 'usurotonkachi,' or 'baka.' And sent the letter off.

The next letter was rather perceptive, and came just a week later. His brother was still in the hospital, his mother was still sad, his father refused to speak to him. The letter started with a, 'Hey, judge, you seem down. What's got the high and mighty Uchiha down in the slumps with the rest of us?' Among other questions, and venting. He was hesitant in writing what had him down. He ended up just writing, 'Nothing, usurotonkachi. You're an idiot. How can you manage to piss off the leaders of three different gangs at once?'

The reply: 'You should really open up more, Judge. You know, use this 'illusion of a link' to your own advantage. And I kicked their asses at basketball. The babies.'

So Sasuke did open up, just a little, because Naruto had wrote a little about his past. How his dad had taught him basketball, so of course he was better then some 'prison yard jock straps'. His little therapeutic session of 'opening himself up' didn't seem that therapeutic, so he kept it short. A simple, 'Family problems. Brother's a cop, got shot, is in the hospital. Father is a little disappointed in my career choice and Mother and Brother are the only things stopping him from disowning me. Same thing as always, really. You really have to not upset the pecking order of things in that prison. If you keep doing it, your going to be writing about the traumatic things they do to you in the bathroom.'

The reply to that was simple, 'Jerk. I don't go to the bathroom alone.' And most things were all right with the world. Because the moron hadn't commented on his family life, and he'd kept the banter up well enough to show he didn't see anything different about him. So his reply was a little longer, and light hearted. And he explained, just a little more about his family problems, but he really was concerned about the idiot's well being in the prison. Stupid idiot was going to get shanked because he couldn't go without one day of posturing like some kind of ape. And he told him so.

He was just getting the reply.

'Dear Judge,

It's not posturing, its defending the territory. You need to prove you're not some weakling animal to be ate at and spat at. (Of course, Sasuke thought, that's what you needed to do, but if you were annoying about it, like a fly, they'd just squash you and be done with it) And I'm not going to get stabbed--didn't know Your Honor would know a ghetto word like shank!--I have enough friends that are scary enough. There's Gaara. He's taken a liking to me, I guess. And he's freaking creepy as Hell, what with those insomnia rings, and that kanji on his forehead… and that black, murderous stare… What the hec did he do to get in here anyways, no one is telling me! (Sasuke knew that it was because he murdered his dad after his mom was murdered by said dad. It was justifiable to Sasuke, but not society, that's why he was behind bars)

And then there's Kiba. He's a dog, seriously. Sharp canines, beady eyes, red fang tattoos on his cheeks. Said he went ballistic at a hunter's lodge because they killed a wolf he used to talk to. I don't know why he's not in the loony bin himself. (Because he didn't kill anyone. Just seriously maimed and ravaged…)

So, yeah. No need to worry about me, Judge. (For some reason, the guy refrained from using his name. It was odd, but Sasuke liked not being addressed in such a formal way. It gave an illusion of friendship, or companionship at the very least) I'm all good and defended on this front.

Hey, so… do you know the story of this guy. Super long name, starts with an O or something… Yeah. Snakey guy, long hair, pale looking. Golden eyes. Really freaky-ass long tongue. Just 'coz I hear him talking, hissing about you to his freaky little tag-along's. It's really, really, really creepy. And, this is prejudiced, but he looks like a pedophile(No shit Sherlock!). And I really don't like how he talks about you. And he knows I know he talks. And he knows I write to you and you write back. He glares a lot.

I think he's jealous you don't write back to him.

NEways! Heh, that was fun, heh. NEways, I'm gonna be put on parole, in a few weeks! For good behavior, they said. Oh, it's October, now, right? At least when you get this? So I'm going to be 23 on the 10th. That's pretty cool. And the week after, I get parole, so Happy Birthday me!

Mmn. I don't like your dad. Or your brother, really. Your mom sounds fun, if she'd loosen up a bit. Maa, go to the party! Bring sake, sake, sake, and beer, and wine, and other such Japanese cuisine, and you are not very nice, Judge! Gaara told me what those words you're always writing mean, and, and, and…

You jerk!

An almost 23 year old Naruto.

P.S. Teme wa baka! (horrible grammar)'

But the effort made him smirk, a bit.

The reply was made quite easily, and written before he attempted his brother's or even his mother's.

'Newly Enlightened Usurotonkachi,

You consort with the oddest people. I'd tell you Gaara's case, but as that might offend you (And him) plus it's confidential, and could cause you to loose some of the protection I'm pretty sure your sorry ass needs, so I'm going to let him tell you. Let's just say he's psychotic. And rather resembling of a tanuki, if I remember correctly. A red headed tanuki… Tell him to get some sleep. The rings will disappear, and he'll be better able to squash the little uprising with your dog-breath friend as I know you'll be needing it. It isn't defending your territory if you don't _have_ territory. Baka.

And Orochimaru. Stay. Away. From. Him. You're spot on why he was sent there, and he's going to stay there if I have much to say about it. I judged his case, he's possessive, ambitious, people viewed him as a genius, and he is freaking ass creepy. And anyway, you act infantile enough to be an easy target for him. Baka.

Twenty-three. On the 10th. Hn. That means I'm three months older than you. Well, as I plan to actually visit the prison, I'm thinking of stopping by to visit you. And yes, I'm actually visiting the prison, hopefully. If Brother gets out of the hospital when he's supposed to, then I need to get a message to his… friend there. Big dark guy with blue hair and sharp teeth. If you tell him you're a friend of Itachi's little brother, he'll watch out for you. Or scorn you, I don't know. He likes messing with me. Oh, wait, he might not recognize the 'little brother' part without the 'foolish' in front of it. Why Itachi insists on calling me that, I really won't ever know.

And Father is a bastard. But Itachi is Itachi and he had more pressure then me so ease up a little on your opinions of him. He's an ass too, but he is my brother. Bastardly, jerk, ass of a brother, but still. He's the only one who didn't look at me with disappointment when I said I wasn't going to be an officer. He actually threw a law book he'd been keeping at my head when I floundered for an answer on what I wanted to do.

Anyways, (not NE ways, moron) I don't drink Sake. Or beer, or wine. It's detrimental to your health.

Your Honorable Judge,

Sasuke.

P.S. You're a moron and your grammar is horrible. Romanized Japanese is horribly Americanized.'

Sasuke took a moment to read over his letter, and fold it precisely into sharp lines and slid it into an envelope. He paid express for it, and the guarantee that it'd get to where it was meant to go before the 10th, two days away. He felt oddly reenergized, and went to pick something up.

* * *

The last day was rather boring, he'd driven over to the hospital where Itachi was to pick him up. He was finally discharged, and then he drove him to their Parents' for Father's birthday. As Sasuke pulled into the driveway, he knew immediately his mother had lied and Father was, indeed, here like his brother had implied in his letter. Unfortunately, as his mother ensured that the letter would get to him to late to reply, he had to come or it would seem rude.

Sasuke watched as Itachi pulled himself out of the car and used his crutches to walk. Sasuke tucked the present he had gotten for his father under his arm and headed in. There was strained silence inside, and Sasuke stayed long enough to say hello to his mother, nod at his father, eat dinner, and stay for some after dinner conversation. When His father started bringing up achievements Itachi had made, and Sasuke had no hope of competing with, he shoved the box at the stern man and made a mad dash for the exit.

The present would most likely be met with scorn, but Sasuke thought it matched his father.

"What Hell is this?!" Sasuke could hear his father yell.

"It seems to be a pet rock, Fu," That was his mother.

"Foolish Little Brother," And there was his brother, his voiced laced in amusement.

The next day he found the letter that Itachi had wrote for Kisame, the man that Sasuke would see today, for him. For his own safety, Itachi wasn't allowed in the prison, it would rile the prisoners he had captured into a frenzy, so Sasuke did it for him. There was the added benefit of finally seeing his little correspondent as well.

He picked up an order from a restaurant and drove his car to the prison. He made his way in, went through the needed protocols, and sat at the chair across from the Plexiglas divider with the phone. A tall, muscular black man walked into the room and sat at the chair across from him. The man had a swath of really wiry blue hair and beady eyes, and really, really sharp teeth. Kisame smiled at him, more like bared his fangs, and picked up the phone. Sasuke did the same.

"Hello, little brother!"

"Hn."

"So, how's Itachi? What happened to the bastard who caught him?"

"Itachi is fine, obviously. And the guy who shot him was killed on scene by another cop. It was unavoidable manslaughter, or justifiable, or defense, or something."

"Cool, cool. So, did he bleed al--

"I wasn't there, I don't know,"

"Whatever,"

"Here,"

Sasuke flattened the note over the Plexiglas so Kisame could read what Itachi had written. The man smiled again, and Sasuke decided he really, really, didn't want to know what it said.

"So, what's the bag for."

"An acquaintance. Which reminds me, do you know Uzumaki Naruto?"

"Uzumaki? Blonde guy, on the short side, athletic, loud, annoying? Hangs out with the tanuki and the Inuzuka?"

"Yeah,"

"Yeah, he pissed off Deidara and some of his friends a little while ago."

"Well, just keep an eye on him."

"Why, is he dangerous or something?" He obviously didn't believe that.

"No, he isn't guilty at all, but the jury judged him as such. Just keep an eye on him. He's an idiot. Could get himself killed. And Orochimaru… Watch out for Orochimaru, too."

Kisame's eyes softened just the tiniest fraction. Kisame and Itachi were two of the very, very few people privy to the information to why Sasuke was known to be very harsh on pedophile cases, and why he had a grudge against Orochimaru. It was so long ago, and biased as well, but it had left a scar on Sasuke's mind and for a very good reason.

"Okay, okay. So your old man's birthday was yesterday, huh?"

"I got him a pet rock."

"What? Oh My god?! Really. Oh… My… God!!!" All this was said between laughing and guffaws, and a security guard slipped in the room to make sure everything was okay. Sasuke let his head drop onto his hand and he shook his head.

"What--hic--what did he think?"

"I didn't stay."

"What did Itachi think?"

"Foolish,"

For some reason, this sent Kisame into another spiral of guffaws. The guards decided that was enough.

"Good one, little bro. Good one!" He put the phone back on the hook and let the guard take him away, still laughing.

Sasuke was sitting on a fold out chair in front of the cell they kept Naruto in. His head in his hand, his cheeks still red. He had waved the guard away so he could have this little moment to feel embarrassed about how Kisame reacted to his behavior. It was highly ridiculous. The bag he'd brought was still steaming at his feet, giving just a bit of warmth to his leg.

"Oh, Judge! You're blushing!"

Sasuke's head shot up at the remembered voice, low, rough, and curious. The security guard had led Naruto back to his cell and was easing him inside, locking the door. Even if Naruto was a week away from parole, they didn't trust him with the Judge who had basically sent him there.

"It's not blushing, it's a reaction the body does when it gets to hot, temperature wise, for comfort."

"Whatever, judge. So, what are you doing here,"

"I told you I was coming,"

Naruto smirked, his tan face becoming a bit more devious as he ran his hand through his unruly yellow hair.

"I guess you did-- wait, what's that smell? I smell.. I smell.."

"You smell ramen, usurotonkachi. Happy Birthday, idiot." He took out a Styrofoam bowl and a pair of chopsticks and a fork--just in case--and handed them to Naruto through the bars. He looked at them hesitatingly, and then slowly grabbed them. Sasuke huffed when he finally grabbed them and opened the lid to the ramen. So, the fork and chopsticks could be seen as potentially dangerous weapons, but no need to act all suspicious. Sasuke knew the head of the security team pretty well--stupid fucking like a rabbit neighbor--and could get away with handing eating utensils to a friend.

"Mmm, ramen, I haven't had this in forever! Itadakimasu!" Naruto then ripped apart the chopsticks and started stuffing his face with the noodles.

Sasuke took out his own bowl and started eating a bit, much slower and neater then Naruto did, he noticed.

"What, did they starve you here or something?"

"Yes, yes they did! All they gave me was some white, tasteless goop in a bowl for breakfast--"

"That would be oatmeal,"

"And then some weird green things in more white mushy stuff for lunch!"

"Vegetables and mashed potatoes,"

"And this weird rubber like round brown thing in sauce!"

"Freezer dinner, salisbury steak,"

"Whatever,"

"So, why'd you come by?"

"I needed to give something to Kisame,"

"Oh. I heard him laughing, it was so loud!"

Red started to paint Sasuke's cheeks again.

"Oi, judge, is it too hot again, or what?"

"I told him about father's birthday celebration."

"Oh, oh! Well, what happened?!"

"We sat. Ate. Father started talking and I gave him my present and left."

"What was the present?"

"A pet rock,"

"A pet rock?"

"Yeah."

"What'd he say?"

"'What the Hell is this?'"

"Wow, what's your mother say?"

"'I think it's a pet rock, Fu,'"

"'Fu'?"

"Short for Fugaku…"

"Eew,"

"Yeah."

"What'd your brother say?"

"'Foolish Little Brother,'"

"Ooh. You're creepy when you do that."

"Hn,"

"What else?"

"What?"

"What else did you get him?"

"Er…"

"Come on, that red on your face is getting brighter, and I wanna know, Judge!"

"A sake set with some department store card that said loosen up."

"Really?! What happened?!"

"I left before he found that part…"

"Really,"

"Yeah,"

"Sweeet!"

"What?"

"I didn't think you'd have the balls, judge! You seem so restrained."

"He was getting on my nerves the last couple of weeks."

"I know. I'm so proud of you! You're growing up!"

"Under your influence, I'd rather stay infantile."

"Wh-what?! God damn, I need a dictionary around you!"

"Hn," It was meant as amusement, it came out like amusement.

"Where did you get the ramen?"

"Some ramen bar close to here,"

"Oh,"

"…"

"Well, hey, I'm 23 today!"

"I bet you don't even know spell twenty-three. I saw it when you spoke, you even think of the numbers instead of the words,"

"What the hell does that even mean, bastard!?"

"Hn, you're a moron,"

"Jerk! I can too spell 23! T-W-E-N-T-Y T-H-R-E-E! There! Jerk!"

"Moron, there's a hyphen between twenty and three,"

"Wha-what?! That doesn't make sense, how is there a python between 20 and 3?!"

"Baka! Hyphen, H-Y-P-H-E-N, the little dash mark."

"How am I supposed to spell a little dash mark?! T-W-E-N-T-Y insert-little-dash-mark-thingy-here-to-uselessly-connect-an-already-connected-word T-H-R-E-E?!"

"Tch," He was so very, very close to laughter and amazement.

* * *

"Soo, you came today?!"

"Yeah,"

"Do you have ramen?"

"Yeah."

"Not very talkative today, huh, Judge,"

"Hn,"

"Jeeze! What's got your panties in a bunch, bastard? This was a new jumpsuit! Standard addition to. The seams are double enforced so it won't rip if I get into a fight, and now its wet!"

"Hn,"

"Aw, come on. What has Mistew Sunshiney aw opset an' sawd?"

"Shut the hell up, Usurotonkachi,"

"Aw, just a ray of fucking sunshine, aren't you?"

"Hn,"

"…"

"…"

"If you just came to sit and brood and ignore me, you can leave! I'm not allowed to leave this cell if you're still here 'visiting' me,"

"Fine,"

"…"

"…"

"Well, that went well,"

* * *

"Ooh, ramen! Itadakimasu!"

"tch,"

"Oh, your staying today?"

"…"

"Okay, okay. I forgive you,"

"What?"

"I forgive you,"

"When did I ask for that?"

"Well, you came today and gave me ramen. Miso Pork, too!"

"And that is interpreted as my intention to get you to forgive me?"

"Yup!"

"Forgive me for what?"

"Aw, now you're just trying to be a bastard,"

"Tch,"

"Heh!"

* * *

"Itachi got some medal congratulating him for putting his life at risk in the line of duty or whatever,"

"Hmm?"

"He-he really didn't look like he cared one way or the other. Like, it was so easy for him to do that, that he just didn't care,"

"…"

"Father was ecstatic about it,"

"Oh,"

"Mm, and I found the pet rock I got him in the garden. By a tree. Chipped."

"Ah,"

"I mean, it was intended to be a gag gift, and I knew he was going to throw it away… but,"

"…"

"I couldn't find the sake set, but I'm pretty sure Mother kept it, if only because it was expensive and she can use it to entertain guests,"

"Nh,"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"When I was younger, after--after mother left and Kyuubi was still an older brother to me, my old man would take us to the park for our birthdays,"

"…"

"He wasn't very rich, his money was spent paying for the families my--my mother ruined. But he kept some aside to entertain us with. One time, though… I was really, really young and it was stupid…"

"Hn?"

"Heh, I would watch my friends get really awesome, expensive stuff for their birthdays. A new cell phone, an iPod©, the new hardback book that was just released,"

"…"

"One day, this kid asked me for my cell phone number--a girl, she was really pretty, and I had a crush on her--but I didn't have a cell phone number to give. She laughed, because the only other kids who didn't have a cell phone were Lee, because it wasn't energetic, and Shikamaru, because he was to lazy to use one,"

"…"

"So I dropped hints to my father about me wanting a phone for my birthday. I was so excited about my presents. I just knew he'd have gotten me one. But when I opened his gift, it wasn't a phone. It was a photo album."

"Tch,"

"Yeah, I got really, really mad. I told him how everyone else got phones, or iPods, or watches, or other things and I get a photo album of people I see everyday. He looked--He looked disappointed. Sad. Rejected."

"…"

"The next day he got me a phone."

"…"

"The girl didn't ask for my number again, and she didn't talk to me,"

"…"

"I lost the phone a month later."

"…"

"I never used it."

"Hn,"

"That… that photo album.. Dad kept it in the closet. I found it after-- after Kyuubi happened…"

"…"

"It has the only pictures I have left of him. Of us. When we were happy,"

"… Ar--are you not happy anymore?"

"No! I-I'm happy now. A-at least, I am when I t-talk to you! So, that's a good thing, right, right?"

"Tch, Usuro--Usurotonka-kachi,"

"Ba--bast--ard,"

* * *

"Ramen, ramen, ramen! Itadakimasu!"

"I'm starting to think you like the ramen more then you like me,"

"Aw, is Your Mighty Honorableness jealous? Don't worry, bastard, I still love you too!"

"And then you're back to the ramen,"

"So, it's good! I can't just let it get cold! You're already cold, I need energy to warm you up,"

"…"

"For some reason, your cheeks just got red, again,"

"Shut up, Moron,"

"Bastard! Hey! Wait! That's my ramen!"

"I'm the one who bought it!"

"But you never eat any of it!"

"Fine!"

"Thank you, jerk!"

"Your welcome, Idiot,"

"…"

"…"

* * *

"Ramen, ramen, ra--what the hell is this?"

"Yakitori.,"

"What?"

"Idiot,"

"…"

"What are you staring at?"

"You have… uhm on the corner of your mouth,"

"…"

"Uh, let me have one!"

"Baka, don't grab! The sticks are sharp!"

"Ah!"

"Moron…"

"Hey, hey, what are you doing?"

"Cleaning you finger so it doesn't get infected and fall off,"

"F--fall off?"

"Hn,"

"Mmn, o--okay, that's good! It's clean, it's clean!"

"Moron. Your cheeks are red,"

"Wh-what! It's hot in here, that's it!"

"Hypocrite,"

"Hippo!"

"Idiot,"

"Oh, hey, this is good!"

"…"

* * *

"Hey, so, I wrote to you, and Orochimaru wrote to you, who else writes to you? Or are we the only ones?"

"Hmm, no. You two plus another are the most frequent but I get letters all the time. They're really annoying,"

"Annoying? You saying I'm annoying? Bastard!"

"Hn. Not as annoying as Karin or Orochimaru. But they're only annoying in their repetitiveness. The rest just have really, really horrible grammar and it's really hard to take a threat or a love confession if they can't write the right way,"

"People write you death threats? People confess their love to you!?"

"Mm, it baffles me, too. They think I'm 'pretty' or something,"

"You are pretty, but, confessing their love to you _through a letter_? That's poorly though out."

"…"

"What? What? Why are you glaring at me like that?"

"I'm not pretty,"

"Sure you are, you have really pale skin, it looks all soft and smooth. And your hair is really shiny and thick, and kind of long for a guy, but hey, it's looks fine. And your eyelashes are kind of long, and they're thick,"

"…"

"Hey, is the room too hot again, Judge?"

"You--You're an idiot, Naruto,"

"…"

"…"

* * *

"Ramen, Yakitori, I don't care as long as it's from you!"

"Wh-what?"

"You bring the most awesome food!"

"Oh,"

"Why, what'd I say,"

"…"

"…"

"Hn,"

"Oh! No, no! I'd think a Judge would have a more reasonable mind! That's… that's…"

"Tch, usurotonkachi,"

"Not, not that I don't think you're bad looking or anything, I mean you're really pretty---I mean attractive--and all that! But that's not what I meant! It, I was talking about food!"

"Tch, your cheeks are red again. Should I crack a window?"

"You bastard!"

"Here,"

"Ooh, Ramen!"

"Idiot,"

"Heh, heh."

* * *

"I think I'm taller then you,"

"Usurotonkachi, I know I'm taller than you,"

"Your not taller then me! It's your stupid duck-ass hair! Makes you look taller,"

"'Duck-ass hair'? Or 'duck ass-hair'?"

"It doesn't make a difference,"

"I am taller than you, baka,"

"Oh shut up judge!"

"Hn,"

"At least I have a better figure,"

"…"

"Well, for athletics and stuff!"

"Whatever, usurotonkachi," Something remarkably like a chuckle escaped his lips.

* * *

"I guess I have to leave now,"

"Yeah… Well, I am getting out on parole pretty soon, so I can visit!"

"Tch,"

"Whatever, Judge, you're excited, you can't hide it!"

"Moron,"

"Jerk!"

"Usurotonkachi,"

"Teme!"

"Yes?"

"Wh-what?"

"Teme technically is just a rude way of saying 'you',"

"Whatever! Bastard!"

"See you,"

"Mmn,"

Sasuke got up and stretched, his muscles protesting for the long amount of time he sat there, talking--just talking--to Naruto. He turned to leave but--

"Hey, Judge, are you going to come by again?"

"When I can," He picked up the bag that held two empty Styrofoam bowls, two sets of separated chopsticks, and a fork. He brought ramen every time he came over, now. Just as Naruto asked, 'Are you going to come by again?' everyday, as if he was afraid that Sasuke would just decide to leave. Just as he would always smirk and snort when Naruto confused himself listening to Sasuke's vocabulary. It was a comfortable, new routine.

"Uhm,"

"Yeah?"

"Why do call me 'Judge'?"

"That's what you are, aren't you?"

"Hn… Not. Not when I'm talking with you,"

"…" Sasuke watched as bright blue eyes slowly blinked, then nodded in understanding. He was flashed a gigantic smile, "'course, Sasuke!"

"Hn," but a small smirk that almost looked like a smile appeared on Sasuke's face.

The hours he spent talking to Naruto just flew by, and was releasing tension this way, too. His brother said that he looked a little bit more relaxed. And that he didn't really seem uptight anymore. Hypocrite. That bastard was always uptight. Though, it might just be brotherly concern finally clawing its way through Itachi's brain.

He turned and brought his hand up in farewell as he started walking away. He felt, sort of content. After today, he felt a bit warmer, and looser, and definitely better then he did that morning. He almost allowed the contented smile to work its way onto his face, if he was any less of an Uchiha, he would have, but--despite what his father said--he was every bit the Uchiha so he denied the stretching of his lips.

He walked quickly, he was sure he spent longer at the prison then he meant, and he did have other things to do. They just didn't seem as important as they had a few hours before. As he was walking past a cell, a white hand shot out and grabbed his, yanking him to a stop and startling him enough that he dropped the bag. The leftover bits of ramen left behind spilled on the floor. Sasuke turned and faced Orochimaru, who slowly drew his hand between the bars of the cell. Swallowing convulsively--and involuntarily--he tugged his hand cautiously.

"No, no, my pet. I want to know what you were doing, talking to the fox,"

Orochimaru's voice hissed like snakes in his ear, faintly familiar from eleven years ago. From back when he was a helpless child easily influenced by the adults in his life. He closed his eyes and let fear wash over him for a while, basking in the foreign emotion, until he opened his eyes and rid them of any anxiety. He let his eyebrows draw downwards and hardened his eyes.

"I was talking, let go."

"Ku-ku-ku. Talking to the fox? That's strange for you, Sasuke-kun," He stretched the vowel noises out, and his thumb started rubbing a small spot on Sasuke's hand. Around and around the thumb went, making the skin on his wrist sensitive and tender.

"Let. Go. Orochimaru."

"Ku-ku-ku-ku, you were always such a quiet, stubborn child. Soft as well,"

Orochimaru let the nail of his thumb scrape against the tender pink skin of the skin on Sasuke's wrist. Sasuke winced at the suddenness of the action and tried pulling his hand again. Instead of loosing the grip of the clammy hand, there was a _woosh _of motion and he found himself with his head pressed against the bars of the cell, his cheek and chest pressed into the metal and his free hand gripping the bars, frantically trying to push away. It was useless, though, because another pale hand was gripping in his hair and keeping him in place.

"Wait for me, Sasuke-kun, because when I get out, I'm finding you, my pet. And when I find you, ku-ku-ku," That long, freakishly long, slimy tongue flitted out and tasted the shell of Sasuke's ear, then traced its way down to where his neck met his shoulder, and the ugly scar there that suddenly _throbbed_ and Sasuke started trembling, his mind remembering eleven years ago, instead of focusing on the today.

* * *

His school teacher, a gaunt young man, twenty, maybe twenty-five, taught his class. With long, waist length, inky black hair and a voice that slithered like snakes. The man would constantly ask him if he needed any help, if he got that problem alright, would he like to spend time after school to understand this problem?

Sasuke always said no. Because he was an Uchiha and Uchiha don't need help from their teachers, or anyone. So it surprised him that one day, he was sticking behind after school ended, hesitantly waiting for Orochimaru to stop grading papers and pay attention to him. Finally Orochimaru looked up and beckoned Sasuke over to him, and Sasuke went. He set the paper--language, he'd never been interested enough in that--on the desk and shifted so he could face Orochimaru and the paper at the same time.

Orochimaru nodded, laughed, and responded at the right times throughout his rant and questions. Finally, Orochimaru pointed a long finger at the paper, and Sasuke leaned forward to see what he was talking about. His breath came out in a puff, and the paper flew across the desk. He leaned forward and tried to catch the fly away essay, but his hand came up short and it slid slowly off the desk. He was about to apologize and work his way around the desk to pick the paper back up, but a white hand over his arm stopped him.

"Leave it, Sasuke-kun,"

He twisted, just a bit, to see his teacher's face above him, smiling--smirking--baring--down at him. The smile twisted in itself, and Sasuke found his head gently pushed back down on the desk. He gulped and shifted, but stilled when he felt the warmth of his teacher's large torso covering his back.

"Ano sa… ano sa…"

"Yes, Sasuke-kun?"

"Wh-what are you doing?"

"Mmm. It'll feel good, I promise,"

Of course Sasuke knew what was happening. He wasn't stupid, he knew it. He also knew that he was really to small and to weak--at least against Orochimaru, the man was larger then him--so it wouldn't be a good idea to struggle. Or make a break for it. He also knew--or thought he knew, he only heard things, after all--that, despite what Orochimaru said, it would hurt. But his teacher was being very gentle, so maybe this was okay? He didn't know how this would work, but he knew it happened between his father and his mother, when they went to bed early. Itachi had told him, and he did have chapter nine in the Science book. Though, he didn't think it could work between two males. Not very well, and his stomach was kind of hurting, being crammed against the desk like that.

He shifted, trying to get his stomach in a better position and then started again.

"What--"

"Shh, shh,"

Something hard was being pressed to his back, hard and hot and kind of long. It was very weird and uncomfortable, strange. He was so focused on that, he almost didn't feel it when a large palm cupped his butt. He did feel it though. And it felt weird, not unpleasant, but not comfortable. The hand moved, stroking his butt-cheek and his thigh. He swallowed roughly, and jumped again as the hand brushed his inner thigh. The hard thing pressed into his back.

Slowly, the hand slid around his body and fumbled at the buttons to his jeans. Now, this, Sasuke was absolutely not comfortable with. He didn't want his pants off--he wasn't ready for his pants off--and he really didn't want his teacher to see him naked. He told his teacher.

"But I want to see you without your pants on. To touch you there. I'm your teacher, right? I wouldn't do anything to hurt you. You can keep your shirt on."

Sasuke felt as if he should know more about this. He knew what function private parts were used for. He got an A on that test. Females had essentially the same parts as men, only inverted and used to make eggs. Males made sperm. Male and Female did a sexual act--intercourse, copulation, sex--and the sperm entered the egg, made it fertile, and its now called a zygote. A lot of people did it. But in everything he'd ever read, watched, heard about, he'd never heard of it between two males. He knew it could happen, Father and Mother tried not to let him hear such things, and whenever he did Father would get angry. But Itachi told him it was possible. He was going to tell him how it happened, like he did when he answered Sasuke's question on 'how did I get here?' but Father caught him. Itachi didn't bring it up again.

So Sasuke knew it could happen, but didn't know how. He didn't know why Orochimaru was touching him, or why it felt _good_. Because it did. It felt really, really good. He was ashamed to admit it, because he didn't like Orochimaru, and his brother had stressed that he shouldn't do this with anyone he didn't like. So, in a way, he felt like he was disappointing his brother, by letting Orochimaru touch him. It was… odd.

Sasuke felt his pants crumble to his knees, and Orochimaru's knee was pressed between his own. He heard another _zzzzziiiiiiiiipp_, and there was something hot, and slightly damp pressing against his butt. It was very uncomfortable, and he shifted. Orochimaru groaned above him, and it sent shivers down his spine. He felt his butt-cheeks being spread, it was so _odd_. It was weird, like it wasn't his body, this wasn't happening, this was a _dream._ But it wasn't, he knew it wasn't, because once the tip of that hard thing--he knew what it was but he couldn't _think_ right now--started to stretch him, it hurt. It _hurt!_ Not like it hurts when he gets hit in the stomach with a soccer ball, or when he falls and sprains an ankle. It hurt like his tongue was burning from the too-hot piece of yakitori his mother cooked for him on his birthday. It hurt like his finger did if he accidentally touched the burning pan on stove. It _burned_.

With that though screaming through his mind--_ItburnsItburnsItburnsItburns!!!--_he jerked away from Orochimaru with a cry. Almost immediately a hand covered his mouth. A hand wrenched his head back, he felt breath on his neck and then wet, wet. Oh God it was a _tongue! _That long tongue that his classmates made fun of because it was so creepy and unusual. It--Orochimaru--licked him. Again. From the shell of his ear to his jaw, and _God_ it was wet and cold. Cold. Very, very cold. He thrashed again, pain blossoming when his hair was jerked and that heavy thing was slipped out of him. He was brought up and slammed back down, forcing the breath out of his lungs and his head to go dizzy. He felt teeth where his neck met his shoulder and he screamed through the hand on his mouth, and screamed because that long, thick, hot thing thrust all the way through him, and _God it hurt. It hurt so much._ It hurt from where the teeth were lodged in his shoulder and it hurt from where Orochimaru was lodged in his butt.

If this was the pain that came with this act, no wonder--no _wonder--_Father was mad when Itachi wanted to explain it to him. No wonder it wasn't in any text books, or the tests he took. No wonder, no wonder, no wonder.

And then Orochimaru moved and Sasuke felt tears slide down his cheeks, and that wasn't good because an Uchiha didn't cry. Doesn't matter if it hurt. It didn't matter. He wouldn't be a _weak_ girl like on the television shows Mom watched when she thought he was asleep. The ones who cry and sniffle and scream because the stranger touched them. Pushed them down on the ground.

He wouldn't, because he was an Uchiha, and Uchiha don't cry.


	2. Polpo con Limone e Aglio

**[A/N:: Warnings for this Chapter:** mention of rape, under aged non consensual sex, brothers bonding, octopus, Italian dishes, and still, odd formatting.

**Note: **This chapter isn't to graphic… Just bonding. God, this wasn't even supposed to have plot! Why? I don't like plot!!!**]**

.: Deuxieme :: Fois :.

.: _Polpo _:: _con _:: _Limone _:: _e _:: _Aglio _:.

Words:: 7,562

It still hurt. It did. An ache at his back, and there was whiteness dripping down his thighs--sperm, he realizes belatedly, because that was a question he'd gotten right on this test as well--and red dripped as well. His shoulder hurt as well, as blood dripped from that, too. His head was tender where his hair had been pulled to get him to cooperate, his cheeks hurt from being pinched, his wrists hurt from when Orochimaru gripped them when he started to weakly struggle.

He sat silently in the chair.

He _hurt_. Or is it more accurate to say he _burned?_

Burned where it hurt, burned with the blood that was heating his cheeks up in shame.

He should have been able to fight, or at least struggle harder. Gotten a hit in somewhere.

But no. he was _weak_. Not like his brother, who wouldn't have lain down to take it.

Not like his _Father_ who would have brought his fist down on this snakey man. He doubted even his mother wouldn't have put up a better fight than he did. They definitely wouldn't still be there, sitting on a chair, letting the man who's cause the pain roughly wipe him off and wrap the crescent marks on his wrists and the bite mark on his shoulder. They wouldn't let the pale man grab their chin and whisper in his ear, 'don't tell anyone about this and maybe, next time, I'll let you taste something good,' and they most certainly wouldn't have nodded, 'yes,' to that.

He was weak. He was weak.

He was shivering, when a shout from the present brought him out of his past. He pulled away from Orochimaru, who was smirking, and smiling and licking his lips in a way that said, 'you _still_ taste of how I remember you,' and he slipped and was on the floor, among the spilt ramen and chopsticks, and he slowly started gathering them and putting them in the bag just as he was gathering himself. The guard finally made it to where Sasuke was kneeling, the knees of his pants getting wet with the ramen broth Naruto couldn't reach.

"Hey, hey, Mister Uchiha, are you all right, what happened?"

Sasuke let his shoulders slump, relaxing, the way his name was said with a undeniably _English_ accent, not correctly at all like a proper Japanese one, it was relaxing. And 'Mister,' instead of -san. Or -kun. It was much, much better. Grounding. He was an Uchiha, dammit. Regardless of whether his father approved of him or not. This would not, _would not,_ affect him.

"Mister Uchiha, what happened?"

"I apologize. I was startled when this man coughed and dropped my bag," he gestured at the stuff he was cleaning.

"Ah, okay. Let me escort you out? I'll call the janitor to clean this up,"

"Th-Thank you,"

He slowly stood, and--against his wishes of course--glanced at Orochimaru. He was smirking, laughing with his narrowed eyes, because he knew.

Dammit, it happened again.

And Sasuke didn't tell anyone.

Again.

* * *

'Sasuke,

I tried 'Dear Sasuke,' but that didn't sound right, so sue me.

So…what happened? I saw you leave, then pass by Oreo's cell. And the bag fell, and you just stood their, like you were listening to that snake, and then you fell. Am I missing something? Or what?

Orochimaru was going to say something to me, before, but I was with Gaara, so he backed away. Weird, huh? Oh well. When are you coming back, all they feed me here is crap. I miss the ramen. Hell, I miss the damn Yucki-toeree what ever!

Damn, I guess what I'm saying is I kind of miss you. 'Coz we're such great friends, and such.

You know. Well, yeah. That's all.

Weirdly Concerned Naruto'

* * *

'Sasuke,

What's up?

Are you ill? Or dying, or sick? Or injured? Because I really hope you have a good excuse for suddenly disappearing on me! It's getting lonely, again. Is it something to do with your father? Your Brother? Your mother? Dog--not, you aren't a dog person… Wolf? Cat? Tiger? Ferret? Weasel? Fox? Whaaaaat? Yes, I'm whining!

It's boring without you!

Yes, I said it!

Was it Orochimaru? You don't need to tell me, I guess…

Uhm. Bye, for now.

You Better Not Be Sick,

Naruto'

* * *

'Bastard!

Get over yourself and talk to me! You fuck wad. Write to me! I will resort to bad grammar you jerk! I will. I won't press that issue anymore, I swear. I just want fooooood! Please.

The Starving To Death Naruto'

* * *

'Judge?

yo wuz up? Ima wrd 'bout u u no? cuz it jus is weird w/o u hear w ramen or sum other shit! Cum bak from the ded, judge, me man!

yer grammatically challenged frend,

Naruto'

* * *

"Today is the day Naruto gets out on parole,"

Sasuke looked up, seeing Itachi leaning on the door frame of his bedroom. How the ass got into his house without him knowing irked him. His brother was wearing a black button up shirt, buttoned to the second to top button. It exposed his long pale throat and parts of his collarbone. His arms were crossed, his back leaning against the doorframe, his good leg--the one that didn't get shot--taking the weight and the other resting. Itachi's tired eyes raked him up and down.

"Hn,"

"Foolish Little Brother,"

There was an unspoken 'tell me what happened,' after that sentence. Sasuke shook his head, pushing himself tighter against the wall. He had unceremoniously took a vacation from life. Except for work. He diligently accepted the trials and presided over them with a concentration and a little bit of irritation--so it seemed--and reveled in the way he would have to concentrate on the annoying bugs so much, that Orochimaru slipped from his mind.

"You're not taking care of yourself,"

He wasn't going to deny that. He wasn't taking care of himself. During the day he worked on as many cases as he could, as well as he could, as thoroughly as he could. When his judging time was over, he cleaned his house. He cleaned and sorted and dusted and everything he could think of in his apartment. It was spotless now, but he still cleaned. He'd worked himself into exhaustion, and then he still worked. Anything to get his mind off of that day, those words…

At night it was so much worse. He put the T.V. on--or the radio for variety--for noise. The lights were all turned on, no shadows, no weird noises. He usually wasn't this paranoid, but that snake… he just was being preventive. Very, very preventive. The mindless T.V. kept his mind from wandering. Sometimes he'd watch T.V. and read. He wouldn't go brain dead from this threat, at least. He didn't go to sleep. He tried it once, with very disastrous results. Nightmares just wouldn't go away. So he didn't sleep.

There wasn't any time for food.

"Little Brother?"

"…"

The bed dipped, and Sasuke glanced over to where Itachi had sat next to him. The man looked awkward for a second. Unsure of what to do. He wanted to comfort his little brother, but he'd only ever comforted him once--such a long time ago--and he was still just as awkward. At least the last time, he knew what to comfort him about, little Sasuke wouldn't tell him, but he and Kisame figured it out--

"Hn,"

Sasuke looked away as realization dawned upon his brother's face. He turned, facing away from his brother. He didn't want to talk about it. He didn't want acknowledge it. He wanted to forget the prison, forget the letters, forget everything. A warm arm closed over his shoulders, and he stiffened just as his brother stiffened.

"What are you doing Itachi,"

"Trying something out, otouto,"

"Hn,"

The arm over his shoulder relaxed, and firmly patted his arm once. It seeped warmth into his back, and neck, even that stupid scar on his shoulder. His older brother's body scooted next to him, giving him something firm--sturdy--comforting--_safe_--to unconsciously lean against. Warmth spread into his side as well as his back. He felt a long, thin hand rest on his hair--tentatively almost--and then pull his head to rest on a thin, warm chest. Giving up, Sasuke pressed into his brother's embrace and let go.

The warm shirt cuddling his face slowly grew damp with tears. His shoulders shook and trembled--and he desperately didn't want his brother to see him like this--and his hands clutched at the black fabric on Itachi's sides, letting the strokes on his hair and shoulder--faltering at first, then becoming stronger and firmer--console him.

There wasn't a sound in the room.

Itachi's breath fanned over Sasuke's shoulder, but he didn't talk.

Sasuke's tears soaked Itachi's shirt, but he didn't whimper.

Sasuke knew, from the trembling in the chest he was leaning against, he wasn't the only feeling helpless--weak--failing--pathetic--and that was the only reason this was okay. His brother was experiencing the same mix of suffering--from exposing the weakness--and gain--being comforted--from this… this _thing_ as he was. So that was okay. In this moment, they could be close again. Before the incident, before Sasuke started edging away from the oak and iron pillar of his family, and the marble pillar of his brother. Before he pushed himself so _hard_ to become strong--powerful--acknowledged--_clean_--and pushed an uncomfortable rivalry onto himself and his brother.

Back to when he was six, and was riding on his brother's back because he sprained his ankle at school. To when he was seven and his brother explained to him the mechanics of how babies formed. To when he was eight and still crawling into his brother's bed because of nightmares. When he was nine and still crawling into his brother's bed because of the storms. When he was ten and still curled up beside Itachi, creating his own comfort, when their father disapproved.

Back to when Sasuke was innocent again, and Itachi was an older brother again.

* * *

"So you won't tell me exactly what happened?"

"I already told you."

"So you saw Orochimaru, he grabbed you, and you had a flashback?"

"I spilt the ramen,"

"_And_ you spilled the ramen. How silly of me to forget, otouto,"

"…"

"He didn't say anything?"

"He laughed. That 'ku-ku-ku' thing."

"Right, so you saw him, he grabbed you, the ramen spilt, you had a flashback, and he went, 'ku-ku-ku.' He didn't say anything?"

"Probably,"

"So he said something or not?"

"Yes,"

"Sasuke."

"So, he said some things. I wasn't listening, I was reliving a certain traumatic _rape_ in my life,"

"No need to be crude, otouto,"

"He said something about me talking to Naruto, then he said I was a quiet, stubborn child, or something… and that I should wait for him…"

"What?"

"And then he licked my ear--"

"He licked your ear?"

"Hn. And then the guard came--"

"He _licked_ you ear?"

"Hn. And the guard came--"

"He licked _your_ ear?"

"Hn. And the guard came--"

"Without your permission?"

"What the fuck, Itachi? Why the Hell would I give my permission?"

"I'm just making sure,"

"What the fuck?!"

"Well, if you didn't, I'm pretty sure I can get away with unavoidable manslaughter on this,"

"Itachi!"

"What?"

"I'm a fucking _judge_! You can't plot a predetermined murder in front of a _judge_!"

"I'm not _plotting!_ I'm fantasizing and planning."

"Itachi!"

"What, I'm a cop, if he gets out of prison I'm going to do the cop thing and catch him. If the process happens to end in unavoidable manslaughter because he, oh, I don't know, _raped _my little brother's _ear_ with his slimy tongue-- Well then."

"I did not hear anything you said."

"Good. Now, what happened with the guard?"

"_Itachi!_"

"So he said to wait for him?"

"Yes,"

"Wait for what?"

"I hate it when you play dual personalities, aniki."

"Well, you are being difficult,"

"Hn,"

"Wait for what?"

"He said he was… he was going to escape and--"

"…"

"Tch. He was going to come after me when he did,"

"…"

"Itachi?"

_Trrrrillll, Trrrrillll, Trrrillll._

"Itachi?"

"Hm? Yeah, Pein. I need you to talk with Sasori and Deidara. Hidan and Kakuzu as well,"

"Itachi?"

"Yes, I know they're not in Akatsuki any more, Kisame and I aren't either…'

"…Hn,"

"Pein, you don't get it."

"…Itachi?"

"No, no, no, no. He _licked_ otouto's ear,"

"Itachi!"

"That's what I expected, go do it!"

"Whatever,"

* * *

"So, have you talked to that little blond friend of yours?"

"Hn,"

"You could, at least, respond to one of his letters,"

"Hn,"

"Tch. Foolish Little Brother,"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You're going to loose him before you even catch him,"

"What?"

"Come here,"

"Why?"

"Just come here,"

"…"

"…"

"..!?"

"Sorry, I'll tell you some other time,"

"Aniki?! Why do you always do that?"

"Hn,"

* * *

"Sasuke,"

"A-aniki? What?"

"Oro--Orochimaru seems to have escaped,"

"… 'seems to,' 'seems to'?"

"Well, he has escaped,"

"What? When?! What time?! How?!"

"Today, this morning. I don't know… He left a note,"

"Wh-- what did it say?"

"…"

"Aniki?"

"He has said that his two targets were you…"

"And… and?"

"And that blonde friend of yours,"

"Naruto? Naruto!"

"Hn,"

"Damn it!" Sasuke punched the wall, without restriction. The wall crack in a spider-web like design around his clenched fist.

Itachi had his arms crossed, his leg finally healed, tender, but healed. Sasuke could feel the weight of his brother's gaze. He was completely resistant to what his brother said his feelings were, but he was confidant in the fact that Naruto was his friend. One of the only friends he had, well… the _only_ friend he had. When he was drifting away from his family--his brother--Naruto managed to push him back. It wasn't entirely Naruto, hell, he might have only had a fraction of the credit justifiably, but he did manage to point Sasuke in the right direction. Sasuke was felt extremely grateful--appreciative--indebted--_loved?_--because of that.

The talks they had before that incident where amusing to Sasuke. He could recall many of the details, crystal clear, now. Those times… they were definitely the best times he had in a very long time. Since he was twelve, to be exact. Why was it, why was it, every time his life was getting okay again, Orochimaru had to come along and ruin it. He wasn't kidding, that far distant time when he told Naruto that Orochimaru was an aggressive--possessive--sick--_enticing_--man. If he could be called a man. That incident had made him remember exactly _who_ the snake was, and who _he_ was. And who _Naruto_ was.

After his initial sulking--breakdown--insecurity--hiding--he came to realize, that because he was paying attention to Naruto, that he might be in danger. He had hoped that, by distancing himself, he would have diverted that snake's attention from Naruto. Apparently, it hadn't worked. And the usurotonkachi was in danger. Because Sasuke had let his emotions get a hold of him. Because Sasuke apparently had decided that he liked the feeling he got around Naruto much more than he cared about Naruto's safety. It didn't matter that he'd never noticed Orochimaru watching him. Or that he forgot Orochimaru was in the same prison. Or that he locked away that he knew Orochimaru coveted--obsessed--fixated--_impassioned_--with/on/by him. The fact was, and remained, that Naruto was in danger because of _him._

* * *

"Wait! What happened? Why can't I speak to him?"

"_He's not here! How many times do I have to tell you?"_

"Well, where is he?"

"_Who are you?"_

"His friend, tell me!"

"_How do I even know you're his friend?"_

"My God, I don't have time for this. Where is Naruto? I need to tell him something,"

"_Your voice sounds familiar,"_

"Fascinating. If you can't tell me why I can't speak to him, than who are you?"

"_I'm a friend. He saved me once, I can't help if I'm over-protective,"_

"Hn. Well, I don't care if he saved you, your family, and an abused puppy! The usurotonkachi is in danger and you're _not_ helping him by not allowing me to talk to him!"

"… _Your voice… sounds…"_

"Why are you so fixated on that?"

"_Desperate. Familiar. Like mine did when I reached out to him,"_

"…"

"_Is he truly in danger?"_

"Yes,"

"_Well, he is in danger currently,"_

"What?"

"_Some thugs cornered him in an alley way. They beat him up pretty badly. He's in the hospital now, and some _people_ are trying to get his parole revoked,"_

"What! Why doesn't anyone tell me these things?!"

"_Should you be privy to that information?"_

"What hospital? Where?"

"_West Twin Cities,"_

"Right, West Twin Cities. That's not to far!"

"_Wait!"_

"What?"

"_You--what trouble is he in?"_

"…a man…escaped from jail. He is-- because of certain situations…the man has a grudge towards him,"

"_Would these 'situations' involve you, in any way?"_

"…"

"_Fix them. Fix them and make sure he isn't hurt by you anymore,"_

"… Fine,"

"_Good bye,"_

"Hn,"

* * *

"Let me see him!"

"Sorry, sir, we can't!"

"Why not?"

"Only family can see him right now, sir!"

"Well… God-damn it!"

"Sir, are you family of Mister Uzumaki?"

"…"

"…"

"Y--yes?"

"Okay then, you are his cousin, right?"

"Y-yes?"

"Alright then. Well, when you get finished with him, just call me! I'm Sakura, by the way!"

"Hn…"

"Right? You _will_ call me,"

"Fine, yes. What ever, just let me see him,"

"Okay then, he's over here--8)8)8)8)hee-heh-tee-hee:3:3:3:3!"

"…wh-what are you doing?!"

"What?"

"Is it professional to cling to a person's arm?"

"O-oh…"

* * *

"N-Naruto,"

"…"

"Damn, you look like shit,"

"Fuck off, bastard,"

Sasuke smirked. The idiot wasn't dead, at least. His mind had been going through palpitations, coming up with bloody scenarios, and black magic rituals. Sometimes, being a famous judge who handled some gory cases wasn't a good thing. He had a photographic memory, he didn't need the pictures from previous cases that _proved_ that those things happened.

"What happened?"

"I already got questioned," The idiot's face closed off a bit as he looked towards the window of the hospital.

"Just tell me, baka,"

"Why? You don't tell me anything," Sasuke winced.

"I-- this--and that--was for your safety,"

"Funny, that was what the cops said," Naruto's face looked angry as to refused to face Sasuke.

"Look… I'm… I was having a hard time. Oro-he. He reminded me of some…things. That'd I'd like to forget," He looked at Naruto, attempting pitiful or apologetic, but the brief emotions he displayed with his brother weren't enough practice and kind of looked like--

"Judge, your face looks like you smelt a skunk,"

The attempt disappeared and Sasuke resumed his indifferent-with-a-dash-of-annoyed expression.

Quiet permeated the small cubicle like room, the beeping of the machines--Sasuke just noticed the machines were there--and their breathing the only noises there. The light from the cool day filtered through the window, shading the white and grey hospital colors in a warm, almost pleasant way. Naruto's body, in the thin hospital frock, was almost vulgarly exposed, his broad shoulders exposed by the ties that were the sleeves. His thick, tan neck was bandaged, a bruise peeking out. On the indignant face there were bandages, a wrap around his forehead, his blonde hair flipping and ruffling around the edges. He had black and purple and green around a devastatingly blue narrowed eye. Somehow, the ugly colors only brought out the blue in his irises.

"Look, I'll tell you. What happened, that is, if you tell me what the people who attacked you looked like,"

Sasuke's attempt at a compromise was met with silence. He stared, and stared, and stared, until finally got something.

"I don't care what happened, Judge. I just wanted you to talk to me, and you just kind of abandoned me," Naruto still didn't look at Sasuke.

"Hn," Sasuke shook his head. He was about to say something--anything--apologize--confess--when his phone trilled in his pocket. He furrowed his eyebrows, seriously considering just ignoring it, but his brother was the only one who would call, and their relationship was still rocky.

"Hn,"

"Otouto! Where are you?!" The man's voice sounded panicked.

"At West Twin Cities Hospital, why--"

_Beep, Beep, Beep._

Sasuke looked at his phone, shocked. His brother had just… hung up on him. That bastard.

"That bastard!"

"Who?" Sasuke looked at Naruto who was staring at him with curiosity.

"Aniki--uh, my brother,"

"You say that often, it sounded friendly this time, though,"

"Yeah… we're…getting along better. Now,"

"Aah."

There was more silence. Interestingly enough, it wasn't awkward. It seemed that, even in this situation, it couldn't be awkward. It was just oppressive. Sasuke pulled up a visitor's chair and sat, warily.

"There was a person at your house. He was the one who told me where you were,"

"Probably Neji,"

"Hyuuga?"

"Aah,"

"How do you know him? He said you 'saved' him,"

"I didn't… I didn't do anything like that," Strangely, red covered his tan cheeks.

"Really, what happened?"

"He, uhm… When we were younger, twelve-ish, I guess--" It would be impossible to miss Sasuke's minute flinch-- "I met him. His uncle, aah… His uncle was oppressive, I guess. Verbally abusive, and stuff. I convinced him to run away. Crash at my place until he got on his feet. And… well, after--Kyuubi-he was one of the first of my old friends to come back,"

"Aah. What… If you don't mind, what happened, with Kyuubi?" It was impossible to miss Naruto's flinch.

"It shouldn't matter,"

"It was a part of your past,"

"You don't tell me your past,"

Sasuke nodded his head, "So you mind,"

"Yes,"

"Okay," There was more silence. Apparently, him not talking was the worst decision he could have made.

"There was six of them…" Naruto's sudden statement made him jump. He looked up. Naruto was still staring at the window, "four at first. A really large, fat guy with orange hair. Beady eyes. No neck. His name started with a 'ji' or something… He was following the orders of this chick, also had orange hair. Longish, with narrow eyes. On the short side, too. She had a really fowl mouth. Temara or Teyuki or something," He paused, and closed his eyes, as if in remembrance, "There was a snooty, dark skinned guy. Dirty, spiky-ish brown hair. He was fast. Ki something? Ti? Then there was this really pale guy, with purple lipstick, white, flat hair. Something kon. He was really, really creepy. His twin, or something popped out from behind him, he was the fifth. They were something kon… bukon? Sukon? Ukon? Akon? Or something,"

"… The sixth?"

"He was leader of all of them, it seemed. He came in later, after they were…finished," he gestured lamely at his wounds, "His was tall, had a relaxed, loose gait. Pale, naturally pale, not the made up powder shit the kon guys had. He had white hair, as well. His bangs where gathered in the front with some Indian-type thing. Really pretty jade-blue eyes. He had on red eye shadow, under his eyes," Naruto made a gesture again, and winced when he touched a bruise, "And dots on his forehead…" He shifted.

"…And, his name?" Sasuke could guess, though.

"Uhm. Kimimaro. They were calling him Kimimaro,"

"Tch!" There was silence, again, as Sasuke's mind flitted from memory to memory, and Naruto let his eyes trace the Uchiha's troubled features.

"Judge, why did you want to know? Do you know them?"

"I--"

The door slammed open as Itachi almost ran into the room. He glanced at the bed, looked confused, and found Sasuke sitting in the chair. Two long strides had him kneeling before Sasuke, his palms over his little brother's cheeks.

"Otouto, Foolish, foolish little otouto…" Sasuke found his forehead pressed against his brother's, while Itachi's ragged breathing fanned against him. Carefully, Sasuke let one of his hands reach around his brother's shaking back to rub in a comforting manner.

"Aniki, did you run all the way here?"

"Stupid, stupid otouto… you said hospital and I ran here, and the pink haired nurse said you were in a room, in the recovery section and I thought for sure--God, you stupid, stupid fool,"

"Itachi-niisan? Itachi, why? What happened?" There was quiet, as Itachi finally found his breath and senses together. One more deep breath and his brother quietly let go of him and leaned back.

"I got a call, from the fire department. I drove to your apartment, and it was torched. Caved in, totally massacred,"

"What?"

"They said that you weren't inside, that's why I called you, and you said you where in the hospital,"

"It's okay, I'm fine. Shh, sh," Sasuke kept his hand on his brother's strong shoulder, and felt an intense warm pride at seeing his brother unglued at the thought he might be hurt. It was a nice feeling, knowing his brother cared for him, but he didn't like it when Itachi was weak. It was like, his god was fallible, or something.

"Does this have something to do with that Kimimaro guy, Judge?"

Both Uchihas looked up at Naruto, his voice making them realize they weren't alone. Itachi stood, gently letting Sasuke's hand fall off him, and stepped to the side.

" 'Kimimaro,' Sasuke?" Sasuke didn't like the way his brother's eyes narrowed and hardened, the light reflecting of the black surfaces, almost making them seem red.

"Aah, Naruto was attacked by him, and what sounds to be Jirobo, Sakon, Ukon, Tayuya and Kidomaru,"

"Wait, wait, wait! How do you know their names? I couldn't even remember them!"

Sasuke looked down, then away from the bright yellow of Naruto's hair. His eyes met the black fabric of his brother's coat.

"So ka… Foolish Brother, you didn't tell him yet?"

"Hn,"

"Tell me what?"

Sasuke stared stubbornly at his brother's coat. He hated his past, hated that three year torture he went through, when he refused anybody's help, and let himself be used. He hated talking about it, and he hated the pitying stares and glances and words. Naruto was his only friend--if he could be called that?--that didn't know of Sasuke's past, and treated him equally. Itachi didn't even know all of it.

"Sasuke,"

"Iie, Oniisan,"

"Hn," Itachi faced Naruto, and crossed his arms. Naruto was still staring at Sasuke, "Sasuke, had an… incident, when he was twelve. It involved Orochimaru, and some of Orochimaru's friends…subordinates…lackeys. Whatever you would call them. Orochimaru was Sasuke's teacher, and put Sasuke in a position where it would hurt Sasuke if he told anybody what was happening--"

"Pft," The noise came from Sasuke, who was still staring at the thick fabric of his brother's coat.

"Well, if you have issues with what I'm saying, tell it yourself, Otouto,"

"Hn,"

"Anyways," Naruto kept his eyes trained on Sasuke's profile, "Sasuke stayed in this… position," Sasuke flinched at the implications--all of them true--but didn't interrupt, "for three years before I and Kisame suspected anything wrong. We confronted the problem and set Sasuke free, scaring Orochimaru off. I told Father what had happened, but he refused to take the incident to court because of how it might affect our family name," Itachi's eyes hardened, "He ignored the matter, like he ignores everything else that isn't perfect." This part was said with a slightly bitter tone. Sasuke's hand reached out and gripped the he of Itachi's coat.

"Those people you named were people who followed Orochimaru when I was…with him," Sasuke said, finally. He caught, from the corner of his eye, Naruto's eyes widening, and Itachi's body stiffening. He had deliberately said 'with,' as if it were consensual, because it was. Despite Itachi's obvious efforts to make it seem as if Sasuke were forced, he never _really_ was. He had chosen not to tell anybody, and he had chosen not to fight back. So it was appropriate he said 'with,' because that was the truth.

"What… what does Orochimaru have to do with anything?" Naruto asked.

"He escaped from prison, and left a note stating who his two targets were," Itachi's voice was straight forward, almost blasé.

"Who?"

"You, Naruto," Sasuke cut in, before Itachi could say anything.

"Me? What does he want with me?!"

"Because you were stealing the attention with what he considers his play thing,"

Naruto stared, at Sasuke, then up at Itachi who had said the words.

"What? What…?"

"Me, Naruto. He wants me back, and was jealous I gave you more attention then I gave him," Sasuke shook his head, almost helplessly, "You don't have to be so vulgar, Aniki,"

"It's true,"

"I'm not his 'play thing',"

"I never said as such," There was more silence, as Naruto tilted his head. Sasuke let his chin drop into his now folded hands, resting on the interlaced fingers. He desperately didn't want Naruto to let this information change his view of him. He really wanted their--excuse the sappy girlishness, but he couldn't express it any other way--budding friendship to bloom, like it was heading towards.

"… Sasu…Sasuke?"

"…Hn?" Sasuke almost hesitantly tilted his head towards Naruto. The patient's eyes were narrowed, thoughtfully, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Did you… No… Will you bring some ramen, tomorrow?"

"What?"

"I haven't had it since you stopped visiting, like, six months ago, so please can you bring it tomorrow!"

"To-tomorrow?"

"Well, you are coming, right? Sa-su-ke?"

"Usurotonkachi!"

"Well?"

"Yes, you moron!"

"Great! For now, tell me how you reconciled with your bastard older brother!"

"I'm right here,"

"Yeah, I know,"

"Bakayarou!"

"Bastard!"

"Ahou,"

"Jerk!"

"Tch!"

"Ah,"

Sasuke watched as his older brother shook his head at his and Naruto's name calling. He felt a sudden urge to smile, because things seemed alright again. And it seemed Naruto had forgiven him, and he had a friend or two to call, to protect Naruto, in any case.

* * *

"Mmmm! Ramen! Finally!"

"What, you couldn't get any when you were on parole?"

"I couldn't find the place you mentioned!"

"Tch, idiot,"

"Jerk,"

"You're going to kill yourself only eating ramen,"

"I will not! I'm in a hospital,"

"Yeah…"

"Hey, don't worry…Sasuke, I heal up pretty quick! The doctors said they can release me in a week!"

"Tch, they shouldn't do that,"

"Why not?"

"Well, you are relatively safe in a hospital,"

"I'm not weak, Sasuke, I can take care of myself,"

"…"

"That was an ambush! I wasn't ready, and I had no idea I was even a target!"

"I was trying to tell you,"

"What ever!"

"Hn,"

"Mmm! Sooo goood,"

"It's just ramen,"

"Le gasp! It's okay, baby, he didn't mean it! You mean so much more to me,"

"Baka,"

"Jerk,"

* * *

"Hey, where's my ramen?"

"Yakitori this time,"

"Oh, that's good,"

"Hn,"

"Hey! This tastes different!"

"Yeah, uhn… I made it,"

"You did? How, I though your place exploded,"

"Was torched. And I'm crashing at Itachi's. Where did you think I was?"

"Uhm… well, I guess that makes sense… you wouldn't be caught dead sleeping on a park bench,"

"Tch, I've done that before,"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah… Actually, that's how I learned to make Yakitori,"

"Really?"

"Yeah, I found some road kill one day, and I was hungry, and there was this stick,"

"What? Wait! Eeew!!!"

"Tch,"

"Hold on…"

"…"

"Was that a joke?"

"…"

"Oh my God, it was! You made a joke! The judge _is_ human!"

"Pft,"

"…"

"…"

"Hey, you ever try making ramen?"

"No, why?"

"Well, this is really good, and I bet home-made ramen is better than take-out,"

"…"

"Oi, is it too hot again?"

"Urusee,"

"What?"

"Shut up, idiot,"

"Jerk,"

* * *

"Hey! The ramen's here!"

"H-hello,"

"Naruto, who's this?"

"Oh, oh yeah! Judge, this is Hinata and Neji Hyuuga! He's the one you were talking on the phone with! Hinata, Neji, this is Sasuke!"

"H-hello. P-p-pleased to m-meet you, Sa-Sasuke-san,"

"It's nice to meet you as well, Hyuuga-san,"

"That's why your voice was familiar. You are the judge from Naruto's hearing, yes?"

"That's correct,"

"Uhm, i-if I may, Sa-Sasuke-san, h-how do you have time to vi-visit Naruto-kun every day?"

"I took a necessary vacation from my duties, Hyuuga-san,"

"P-please, just Hi-Hinata,"

"Okay, Hinata-san,"

"Oi! Can I have my ramen, now?"

"Usurotonkachi,"

"Wh-what?"

"Uchiha,"

"Hey, it's procedure, guys! I call him jerk and bastard and… uhm… yeah, and he calls me weird Japanese things!"

"Is that professional, Uchiha-san?"

"I'm on vacation, Hyuuga-san,"

"Can I have the ramen?"

"Tch,"

"…"

"…"

"Itadakimasu! Oooh, mmm, this is good!"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"You didn't buy it from that place?"

"Hn, Itachi bought some noodles, so I decided to try my hand at it,"

"It's delicious! Yeah, way better than take-out!"

"Tch,"

"Y-you cook Sasuke-san?"

"A little bit,"

"When did y-you learn?"

"I left my parent's house early, and I didn't like eating take-out all the time,"

"Interesting,"

"Yeah, he's actually really good at it! Here, here, try some, Hinata!"

"Uu-uwaah? N-Naruto-k-kun?"

"Idiot!"

"Naruto,"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"See, it's good, huh, Hinata?"

"Y-y-y-y-esss,"

"Oi, are you to hot? Hinata? Do you want the window open?"

"O-oh, n-n-n-nooo, uh, I-I'm f-f-fine,"

"I think we should leave now, Naruto, it was nice seeing you, again,"

"Of course, Neji! It was great! See you later,"

"Good bye, Uchiha,"

"Hyuuga,"

"…"

"…"

-'-

"Uchiha,"

"Hn?"

"Have you fixed that problem yet?"

"I'm working on it…"

"If you hurt him, I'll hurt you. You know that, yes?"

"Hn,"

"I do not think you're taking this seriously. Naruto has had bad things happen to him. He has serious abandonment issues. You're not the type to give him what he needs, Uchiha, and if he wasn't sp convinced he wanted you, I wouldn't allow you near him,"

"We are just friends, Hyuuga,"

"Hn,"

"…"

"…"

-.-

"What was that about?"

"Nothing. Hyuuga is just paranoid,"

"Okay. You should cook ramen more often!"

"Tch, you have a one-track mind!"

"Mm-hmm,"

* * *

"Here,"

"Yesh!"

"It's not even ramen, idiot,"

"Sooo! I'm not picky when it comes to your cooking,"

"Baka, I could poison it, you know,"

"You're a judge, you wouldn't do that,"

"Hn,"

"So, what is it? What is it?"

"Prici,"

"Prissy?"

"Prici. It's olive oil, tomatoes, basil, and cheese,"

"Ugh! You did poison it! I hate vegetables,"

"Well, then I'll eat it,"

"What else do you have?"

"Stuffed Tomatoes,"

"Do have anything without tomatoes,"

"No,"

"Why?"

"I haven't had tomatoes in a while, I like them,"

"Oh,"

"…"

"Well, I could try it, I guess,"

"Okay, here,"

"…"

"…"

"How do I eat this?"

"With the bread, like this,"

"…"

"…"

"Ooh. Uhm, okay,"

"What?"

"Some olive oil and crumbs right…here…"

"…"

"Uhm…"

"Do you want the window open, usurotonkachi?"

"Jerk, no!"

"…"

"Hey, this is good! For, you know, vegetables. What is it?"

"Prici,"

"Prici?"

"Hn. It's Italian."

"How did you make it?"

"Just extra virgin olive oil, roma tomatoes, mozzerella cheese, basil,"

"There's a lot of flavor here,"

"Hn,"

"So, let me try the stuffed tomatoes!"

"Okay,"

"I just bite it?"

"Yes, Naruto, you just bite it,"

"…"

"You're a messy eater,"

"This is good! What'd you stuff it with?"

"Tomato,"

"Obviously, what else?"

"Pasta, parmesan, chives, parsley, basil, thyme, olives, olive oil, pepper,"

"Oh wow! Is this Italian, too?"

"Yes,"

"You know a lot about Italian foods,"

"Tomatoes are a staple in their diet, and tomatoes are my favorite fruit--"

"Tomatoes aren't a fruit,"

"Yes, moron, it is,"

"No, they aren't. They're a vegetable,"

"They're a fruit,"

"Vegetable,"

"Fruit,"

"Vegetable,"

"Fruit,"

"Vegeatab-- hey, what's this other thing?"

"Potatoes and tomatoes,"

"What's it have?"

"Tomatoes, potatoes, Romano, salt and pepper, olive oil, basil,"

"Oh, this is good,"

"Hn,"

"So, you made all these?"

"Yes,"

"For me?"

"No, for me,"

"Aw, but you share them with me?"

"Yes,"

"Aw, you do care!"

"Tch,"

"Do _you_ want me to crack a window?"

"Usurotonkachi!"

"Mm, that was good,"

"I'm so grateful for your approval. I can die happily now,"

"Oh, stop being sarcastic, jerk,"

"Usurotonkachi,"

* * *

"Hey, Sasuke?"

"Hn?"

"Can you get that for me, please?"

"Can't you get it yourself, moron?"

"Uhn…"

"Nevermind,"

"…"

"…"

"Thanks,"

"No problem--don't drop it--"

"Sorry!"

"Usurotonkachi!"

"…"

"…"

"…H-hey, Sasuke?"

"What now?"

"That, on your shoulder…"

"Tch! What about it?!"

"It's… it's nothing. But sometimes, you rub your shoulder, sometimes, and look away. Especially when you give me a new dish to try, or something new happens… Something that puts you on the spot. Like now!"

"That's a habit,"

"I got _that_, but just now, when you were leaning down to get that, the collar of your shirt fell a bit, and I could see just the edge of a scar, or a burn?"

"It's… it's nothing, Naruto,"

"Are, are you sure?"

"Just, just something I got when I was younger, while being an idiot,"

"…aah,"

"And why where you looking at me?!"

"I wasn't, I just noticed the collar!"

"Why would you notice the collar on _my_ shirt slipping down?!"

"It, well! It… your skin is like a girl's, so… I don't know!"

"Usurotonkachi!"

"Jerk!"

"…"

"…"

* * *

"…"

"Hey, I'm probably getting out soon,"

"When?"

"Uhm, the day after tomorrow, if things go alright,"

"Aah,"

"Oh, hey, Itachi's here, too!"

"Hello,"

"Whatcha got this time, chef?"

" 'Chef,' little brother?"

"It's--he's--baka."

"Tch, what do you have?"

"Mediterranean Pizza--"

"PIZZA!!!"

"_Polpo con limone e aglio_, and Semolina Gnocchi,"

"What?

"Octopus with lemon and garlic, and a kind of Roman dumpling,"

"…?"

"And Frittata with sun-dried tomatoes,"

"Well, if you say its good…"

"Baka,"

"Oh, hey, these little bread things are good!"

"Hn, they're the Gnocchi,"

"Little brother, you've become quite the cook, this Octopus is delicious,"

"Aah, thank you, Aniki,"

"Mm, this little triangle things are good!"

"The frittata,"

"How do you make those things?"

"What?

"The Nochi and Frita?"

"The Gnocchi, is made with a durum wheat--ground--milk, salt, butter, and Romano cheese with a little nutmeg,"

"Ooh, good, good! And the Frita?"

"The _Frittata_ is made with sun-dried tomatoes, olive oil, onion, thyme, salt, pepper, and eggs with parmesan."

"Oh,"

"Naruto, you should try the octopus,"

"But it's _octopus_, Itachi!"

"It's good, Naruto,"

"He doesn't have to, aniki, that'll just be more for you,"

"Hn, why you make if you don't like octopus--"

"I like octopus, aniki,"

"Really…?"

"Yeah, I'm just not…hungry,"

"So you won't mind if I tell Mother to make it at the next get together?"

"…"

"…"

"Tch, bastard,"

"Naruto, you don't have to eat it…I made it mostly for Itachi,"

"Well, you made it and Itachi hasn't dropped dead yet, so I should try it,"

"Usurotonkachi,"

"Jerk…I should eat the food you bring for me. It's got to be better than this shit they try to pass off as food here,"

"Hn,"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…Hey!"

"It's good, huh, Naruto,"

"How come you haven't said it, but I get the feeling that would be translated as 'I told you so,' Itachi?"

"Because it would,"

"Hmph,"

"Give Sasuke some credit, he'd make the perfect housewife--"

"Itachi!"

"--roommate, the perfect roommate,"

"Ahou!"

"Well, it's true, Sasuke! You cook, and you're smart, and you're moody--"

"Urasee, baka!"

"Otouto…"

Sasuke sat up in indignation. He could feel the amusement pouring out of Naruto and his brother, but he really was getting tired of his brother's jibes at him. They were annoying and totally off base. The first friend he gets and his brother tries to make it out to something it's not. Definitely not. Even if he was interested in those kinds of things, what happened when he was twelve would probably switch him off men--or at least being submissive, and he didn't have the energy to fight with an obviously dominant, or at least resistant, Naruto--and women were just too annoying anyways.

His phone trilled in his pocket, and he took it out. The caller I.D. said Suigetsu--the man that Sasuke had put in charge of overseeing Naruto's safety.

It may have seemed weird for a judge, but Sasuke was still an Uchiha, and Uchiha definitely had connections with the underground. That was partly the reason why his Father was so against him being in law, it was like betraying the family. Even if Sasuke never gave away the family, or gave tips or anything of the sort, he was a threat, a liability, and his father hated those.

He flipped open the phone and listened for a heartbeat. His shoulder itched.

"Suigetsu?"

"Neeh… Sasu-ke…"

"Suigetsu? What is it?" The reception was kind of choppy, so he stood and moved outside of the room, lifting a lazy hand at his brother's and Naruto's glances.

"Sa-su-ke… Nngh… Don't… Don't--he's. He's-he-here,"

Cold dread spread over his body. The door to the room shut behind him with an almost audible _click_. The halls were abandoned, strange in the recovery ward… at least from what he saw. There was no noise except for the muffled conversation behind him. There was a muffled shout from the phone and he almost jumped.

"Sui--Suigetsu! Are you there? What's happening?! Damn it, Suigetsu!" He wanted to shout, but he didn't want to alert his brother… or Naruto. They didn't need to be involved, "Sui-"

"He's still alive, Sasuke-kun…"

"Oro--orochi-maru…"

"Ke-ke-ke-ke! I'm so glad that you remember me, my pet,"

"I'm not your…"

"Of course not. But you don't want your friend hurt anymore, do you?"

"He's not my--"

"Hn,"

There was a sickening crunch, and another muffled scream.

"Stop!"

"I'd say he was your friend."

"Just, what do you want?"

"You know what I want, _Sasuke-kun_," And if there was any doubt, the way the snake positively _crooned_ his name erased all traces of it.

"Wh-when?"

"Now, up on the roof top, click, click, click, Sasuke-kun,"

"Where he was stationed?" It gave Sasuke immense satisfaction as he found his resolve again.

"Of course, pet,"

"Okay, don't hurt him…"

"Get here fast, pet. Hurry, hurry, and don't hang up!"

Sasuke gripped the phone. He glanced back at the door to Naruto's room, his friend was expected to get discharged the next day, that's why Itachi had come. That's why Sasuke had even put the effort into making a rare dish--at least in America--like the octopus. Sasuke really, really didn't want to make Naruto stay in the hospital any longer than he had to. So, he quietly opened the door and popped his head in.

"Aniki, I'm going to the restroom, okay?"

"Do you need me to hold your hand, otouto?"

"No! I just told you so wouldn't be worried! Sheesh, see if I ever make that mistake ever again!"

"Go, go, we're fine,"

"Alright," he paused, fright grasping his heart like a vice, "Eto, good bye, Oniisan, Naruto," He kept Naruto's eyes captive, for a very long moment, before shutting the door and running to the next building.

Almost half-way there, Orochimaru's voice started humming over the line:

"How much is that bird in the window…?

The one with the flippy hair,

How much is that bird in the window…?

Oh I do hope he is for sale," The tune ran into Sasuke's head, and he was reminded of the scary movies, where the little kids' play songs where twisted into a threatening theme.

"How tight is that pet in the window…?

The little moon-like one,

How tight is that pet in the window…?

Oh I do hope that he is snug," The lyrics were creepy, too. And Sasuke had an inkling on who the 'pet' in the window was.

"How fast is the boy in the window…?

The one that is totally mine,

How fast is that boy in the window…?

Oh I do hope he's too slow, this time," Sasuke gripped the phone tighter, letting his legs protest from the pace he set them at. Suigetsu wasn't his friend, but Sasuke did care for him. He was running up the stairs of the building, pushing open the door to the last floor, and pulling down the ladder to the roof.

"That poor little bird in the window…"

Always worthless in his quests,

That sad little bird in the window…

Condemning his friends to death."

Sasuke pushed open the hatch-door to the roof and catapulted out. His eyes met Suigetsu's almost blank, sky-like ones, just as he saw a long, pale finger pull the trigger of some type of gun without a silencer. The shot echoed in Sasuke's head, and he was sure it could be heard in the hospital. That was probably the point. The blood was splattered over the floor of the roof, the gravel soaking it in like rain. His body stopped moving, not even falling, as his mind registered the dull thump Suigetsu--Suigetsu's body made as it hit the gravel.

He was shaking, he realized. Trembling--quivering--quaking--_terrified_--as his fingers lost their grip of the cell phone, and the tips of the digits became numb with a perceived cold. He didn't even struggle as he felt his arms wrenched behind him, and he knees were kicked out of under him. He didn't feel the sharp edges of the rocks beneath his knees as he was pressed into them by the weight on his shoulders. Nor did he flinch as a pale hand brush against his cheek and down his neck to the teeth made scar on his shoulder. The snake smirked and gently let his finger rub over the scarred tissue there.

Sasuke let the blackness that came with a sharp blow to his temple with the handle of the gun that man was holding, to take over his vision and his faltering mind. It was so much easier, he thought, than dealing with reality.


	3. Shattering a Child with Silence

[A/N:: Warning for this Chapter:

graphic torture scenes, psychological/emotional/physical torture, pedophilia, blood, gore, pain, angst, cursing, non-con, an OC who isn't and OC (I just never say their name), drug abuse, weird formatting, experimentation, bad, bad joo joo.

**DO NOT READ IF YOU GET QUEASY. It's quite bad, and horrid.**

**Chapter Rating: M+ or R**

**Not suitable for the Immature or Innocent**

**Note:** god damn plot! Die, die. Writing torture scenes is fun… O.o'**]**

.: Troisieme :: Fois :.

.: Shattering :: a :: Child :: with :: Silence :.

Words: 7,334

"Are you awake, my pet?"

"He isn't going to wake up anytime soon, you hit him rather hard,"

"Oh, but Kabuto, I wouldn't have hit him that hard if he couldn't handle it,"

"Yes you would,"

"Hm. You're right, but I'd be sorely disappointed if he couldn't handle this,"

"Nnngh,"

"…"

"Hah, I told you so, Kabuto,"

"Of course, Orochimaru-sama,"

"Sasuke? Sasuke-kun?"

"Whu--Ngh!"

"…"

"Nnng!"

"Hmm, you still taste the same,"

"You, bastard!"

"You remembered!"

"I don't remember you!"

"Then maybe I should make Sasuke-kun remember me?"

"Nngh, mmn, Guh!"

"Keh-keh-keh-keh,"

* * *

"Let me loose!"

"But Sasuke-kun, Orochimaru-sama said not to,"

"Coward!"

"Sasuke-kun would only run away, again, if we let Sasuke-kun loose now,"

"Why the hell am I on this table?!"

"So the scalpel can get at Sasuke-kun easier,"

"What?"

"Orochimaru-sama wished that Sasuke-kun's skin wouldn't scar… but he also wished that Sasuke-kun didn't run away. Orochimaru-sama said that Sasuke needed to be punished. How does Sasuke-kun like that?"

"Stop talking like that! What do you mean 'punish'?"

"This scalpel here, is very, very sharp. It'll pierce Sasuke-kun's flesh, and Sasuke will barely feel it. But if it goes deeper, it'll hurt Sasuke-kun very much. Orochimaru-sama asked Kabuto-sempai cut, but Kabuto-sempai didn't want to. Kabuto-sempai is very steady at cutting, but Sempai's Kohai is just learning. So the scalpel will start here, on the sternum--"

"Tsshh!"

"--and it will cut down in this direction. When it gets to Sasuke-kun's stomach, then the cut will split into two. Kabuto-sempai said that Sasuke-kun's skin is very sensitive. Sasuke-kun's skin is very pretty, as well. White and smooth. Kabuto-sempai said he wanted some of Sasuke-kun's skin, so the scalpel will remove some, from this area here,"

"Why does he want… that?"

"Ssh, shh, Sasuke-kun. Kabuto-sempai's orders aren't finished yet. The scalpel did the 'Y' cut first so the scalpel would be able to take away the skin of Sasuke-kun's left and right pectorals easier, yes? And part of the pretty skin on Sasuke's ribs, here, and here,"

"Don't touch me!"

"Sasuke has pretty skin. Kabuto-sempai's selfish in wanting it all for Kabuto-sempai, and not sharing,"

"You… get away,"

"That is all the skin that Kabuto-sempai wished for, so the scalpel will be finished. But Orochimaru-sama said that wasn't enough punishment for Sasuke-kun… Sasuke-kun was a bad boy, yes? So Kabuto-sempai made this powder. It is chili, and salt, yes? Kabuto-sempai said mix it with the lemon juice and rub it into Sasuke-kun's new wounds. Here, it smells spicy, yes?"

"--Kff!--Ckk-hack--kukuhkeh!"

"Kabuto-sempai said to keep the powder on Sasuke-kun's wounds for a while. Kabuto-sempai said that Sasuke would be strong, and get used to the pain, after awhile. So Kabuto-sempai said that when Sasuke-kun stopped screaming then mercy should be given and the powder should be washed off. Kabuto-sempai said that this would get Sasuke-kun's skin all clean again,"

"Pft! Tha--kef--that's Peroxide!"

"Yes, yes, that's what Kabuto-sempai called it. Sempai said it would bubble on Sasuke-kun's pretty skin, making Sasuke-kun's skin look like diamonds…"

"N-no, it won't!"

"Sempai and Orochimaru-sama took bets on how long Sasuke-kun would scream,"

"I won't!"

"Scalpel should get started, yes? Scalpel starts here,"

"Gyah!"

"And goes down here,"

"Mnngh!"

"And Sasuke-kun's screams start now, yes?"

"GYYAAAaahh!"

* * *

"Sasuke-kun,"

"Go--go awa--gah!"

"Aw, Sasuke-kun, are you hurt?"

"Urasee!"

"Do you remember me, yet?"

"No, you snake-bastard!"

"Mm, too bad. Soon enough, though,"

"Gyyaah!"

"And you'll be calling out my name,"

"Mmg! You wish!"

"Keh-keh-keh,"

* * *

"Sasuke-kun's bandages are crusted, yes?"

"Don't call me like you know me,"

"Oh, does that upset Sasuke?"

"No, it's annoying,"

"Orochimaru-sama said to say '-kun,' though. Is it that bad?"

"Yes,"

"Well then, 'Sasuke-chan'? Or 'Sasuke-tan,' instead?"

"Neither!"

"Sasuke looks cute, though, with pretty white skin, smooth white skin. Sasuke looks like a pretty girl! So Sasuke-tan!"

"I-iie!"

"Sasuke-tan's bandages are crusted, it will hurt when the bandages get pulled off. Normally, Kabuto-sempai would use water to soften the bandages, but Sasuke-tan is still being a bad boy, yes? So Kabuto-sempai said not to use water. Sasuke-tan's new skin will be ripped off, yes? It will hurt Sasuke-tan,"

"Mn,"

"Sasuke-tan flinched? Maybe Orochimaru-sama will loose this bet. Kabuto-sempai is a doctor, so he should know when Sasuke-tan will break. But Orochimaru-sama has done this a lot more,"

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why are you doing this?"

"Orochimaru-sama said to,"

"Besides that!"

"Uh… Sasuke-tan is interesting. Orochimaru-sama said Sasuke-tan was strong, so… proof was wanted. And Sasuke-tan gave proof. Yesterday, Sasuke-tan didn't scream. Even though Sasuke-tan's skin was being sliced off, and burned, yes? Kohai wants to know why Orochimaru-sama is so interested in Sasuke-tan, yes? And. And Sasuke-tan is a challenge,"

"A challenge?"

"Yes, Sasuke-tan will be fun to watch break. Sasuke-tan's screams will be delicious to hear. Like Sasuke-tan's skin looked like diamonds when peroxide was poured over it, Sasuke-tan's screams will sound like angels when he shatters,"

"Sh-shatters,"

"Plus…"

"…"

"Kohai likes Sasuke-tan,"

"Wha--Nnn?"

"Mmm, Sasuke-tan tastes like blood and snow,"

"…"

"Sasuke-tan tastes like blood and snow, but later, Sasuke-tan will taste like ashes and tears,"

"…"

* * *

"Let's see… Your vitals are still good. And you haven't got any infections. Just enough layers of skin were sliced off, so it will grow back without permanent scarring. Mmm-hmm,"

"…"

"Hmmm. And the incisions along the flank aren't jagged. They're smooth, and follow the indentation of the ribs, so maximum pain was inflicted without serious injury. They're deep, but they will heal fine,"

"Don't talk about it as if it were a hospital surgery,"

"But Sasuke-kun, that's basically what it is. To me and Orochimaru-sama,"

"Hn,"

"So stubborn! And disrespectful as well. But it seems that my kohai is doing a very good job. And he is unusually focused on this assignment. I can't wait until tomorrow's treatment,"

"D-d-don't,"

"Sh, sh, Sasuke-tan,"

"S-stop,"

"My, Sasuke-tan was supposed to last longer, though,"

"G-get… get away!"

* * *

"Don't struggle so fiercely, Sasuke-tan, if Sasuke-tan struggles too violently, the needle won't be steady and Sasuke-tan's eyelids will be cut,"

"Then get tha-at away!"

"Heh, heh. Sasuke-tan, close your eyes, if Sasuke-tan keeps them open it's more difficult to get the needle underneath the skin,"

"God dammit! Get away!"

"Che, Sasuke-tan's eyes are going to get all scratched if Sasuke keeps struggling, yes?"

"Haah… Nn!"

"Sh, ssh, Sasuke-tan. Sh, sh, ssh,"

"Whuh… Mmn, tha't?"

"Just a mild paralysis serum,"

"Whu-mm…?!"

"There we go, now just close Sasuke-tan's eyes… There. Sasuke-tan can't move, Sasuke-tan can't make coherent sentences either,"

"Guhh… nmmgh,"

"See, yes? But Sasuke-tan can make noises and Sasuke-tan can feel everything, yes?"

"Mmmnnngk,"

"So here's the first stitch--"

"MMMNNnn!"

"Connecting the lids--"

"NNNKKkk!"

"This is wire, so when the serum wears off--"

"KkmmmnNNGh!"

"Sasuke-tan will get cut if Sasuke moves to much--"

"NNNnniiieeek!"

"Now another stitch, be careful of the cornea--"

"FFFfuuhhmmmmk!"

"Pull it to the end of the wire--"

"stttaannnnmmm!"

"Another stitch--"

"Puh nnnnmmmgh!"

"Keep crying, yes? Sasuke-tan is cleaning the blood away--"

"MMMuUUuuhhhh!"

"Is Sasuke-tan broken now? Or does it just hurt?"

* * *

"Aah. Sasuke-tan is coming back around, yes?"

"Nnng,"

"Is Sasuke-tan broken yet?"

"O-oi, Oi! Wh-y can't… Why can't I s-see?!"

"Sasuke-tan? Is Sasuke-tan broken, yet?"

"I- I can't…"

"Kabuto-semapi said to sow Sasuke-tan's eyes shut, so Sasuke-tan's eyes are sown shut,"

"Whu-- aah…haah…"

"Sasuke-tan's eyes stopped crying a while ago. Tears aggravate wounds… It burns, yes?"

"Aa-ah…"

"Tears have salt in them… Remember when salt and chili and lemon was put on Sasuke-tan's skin?"

"C-can't… s-see? Ha-aah,"

"Hmm? Oh! Sasuke-tan is in shock, yes?"

"Nn,"

"…"

"Nnm,"

"Kohai told Sasuke-tan that Sasuke would taste of ashes and tears,"

"Aaa!"

"Sasuke-tan is crying, again,"

* * *

"Sasuke-kun?"

"Piss off, Orochimaru,"

"So you've finally remembered me, Sasuke-kun?"

"Fuck you,"

"That's not nearly the way you talk to a host,"

"This isn't how you treat your guests,"

"That depends on who you're visiting, Sasuke,"

"Cut the shit, why the hell am I here?"

"You aren't in any place to be demanding, Sasuke-kun,"

"…" Sasuke refrained from using the retort he had in mind, if only because Orochimaru was right, and Sasuke wasn't in the place to make demands. He couldn't even see, and _goddammit_ but his eyes hurt. The first half hour of him flinching, and wincing, and generally trying to open his eyes made the relatively thick--come on it's in his freaking _eye!_--wire cut and chaff his cornea. It felt like his eyes had a sudden craving for crunching on shards of shattered glass! The next hour had him trying to fight the urge to blink, even when he didn't have to(blink), for fear of damaging his eyes any more. When Orochimaru had come slithering through the door, he flinched and felt like his eyes were _bleeding_! When he lifted a hand to feel--Kabuto had judged him harmless with his eyes sowed shut and let them loose as a taunt--they came away wet, but he couldn't fucking _see_ what came off of his cheeks.

The sounds of feet padding softly over to him set him on edge and had his head turn, involuntarily towards the snake with a sharp motion. It hit him, randomly, he felt, that the footfalls were soft when they should be loud, clipping, and taunting, like in horror movies. The floor felt cold, and hard, and made of a concrete or stone like substance--at least in the spot he was in(he was thrown in a different room/cell/whatever/ after the 'treatment', as Kabuto called it.)--and it felt as if Orochimaru's shoes should click on the hardness.

He could hear, definitely hear, the snake _smile_. One of those, 'I-have-won-and-there's-nothing-you-can-do-about-it-so-be-a-good-sport-why-doncha?-smiles. His arms tingled, and he felt goose pimples rise on his arms at the same time as he felt that stinging awareness of a person or thing invading a certain, invisible perimeter surrounding him.

The anticipation he had built up in the time between those first words uttered by the man who had literally and figuratively put him through excruciating--horrifying--painful--_addictive--_torture, two times, and the man actually letting his long, thin--shockingly hot--fingers rest on his cheek caused him to flinch away so much more violently then he needed to. He cried out when the muscles around his eyes contracted and shoved the wire into places wire didn't need to go, and felt his cold cheeks grow warm with his shame at the action.

Orochimaru laughed; a slithering, mad, psychotic chuckle that sounded both admonishing and amused at the same time. Sasuke sensed, more then felt or--obviously-saw when the man shook his head in what could be assumed as wonder. The long, wispy strands of silky hair that fell, straight, from the man's head brushed the hand Sasuke had gripping the fabric of his pants at the knee.

"Broken already, pet?"

"I'm not your pe--I'm not a fucking toy to be broken or not!"

"Of course not," His voice held a faked patience akin to an amused adult at a stubborn child. Whether he was answering Sasuke's exclamation or his own question, Sasuke didn't know.

His head hurt, Sasuke realized. It hurt a lot, a throbbing stinging pain that was creeping from his temples the center of his forehead. The headache probably came from being physically and mentally tortured(fucking psychopaths!) for…

Sasuke didn't know how long. He didn't know how long he'd been at the mercy of Orochimaru's laughter and Kabuto's experiments. He had no clue how many times that creepy kohai of Kabuto's that had no name cut him with precision, or dripped a burning liquid on him in stinging doses, or how many times he methodically applied quick-working medicine and tightly wrapped linen bandages around him. After that first session the seconds blended into minutes blended into hours blended into days blended into nights blended into god-knows-what. When he wasn't drugged to paralysis or dopey-ness or submissiveness and was lucid enough to struggle, when he wasn't just looking at plain, detail-less walls, when he had those decidedly few moments in time, where it was a moment--snapshot--photo--_memory_--and his mind categorized and filed and analyzed and overloaded itself with detail, and senses, and sounds, and feelings, and _everything_, time slowed down, it almost stopped and played in slow motion…

It reminded him of when he was younger, those three years he spent under Orochimaru's thumb. The time after his shoulder had scarred, and it was a mark of who he belonged to. It started with that one time in the classroom, and it just kept going, and going. Like the energizer bunny, Sasuke though. He was in a daze then, the days and months melting into one another, each just a repetitive routine that he didn't like but lived with because that is what he thought he had to do. But… that wasn't true. He was young then, and he hated, hated what Orochimaru made him do…but on another level--some sick level underneath everything else that made up 'Sasuke'--he, didn't enjoy, but expected?--sought?--wanted?_--needed?--_the treatment that the snake freely doled out.

When he was twelve, thirteen, fourteen-going-on-fifteen years-old Orochimaru didn't do what he was doing to him now. He didn't strap Sasuke down and peel off his skin, or sow his eyes shut, or anything like that. He slipped drugs into Sasuke's drinks, sometimes. He kept Sasuke's mouth closed and kept him still when he took him. He didn't make a lot of it pleasurable, either. But it wasn't…bad, necessarily.

It chipped his sanity away, piece-by-piece, because of the emotional turmoil: the taint he was carrying and contributing to the family name, the disgust he felt for himself by betraying his brother, the _dirtiness_ he felt after everything, the shame when he woke up in semen, sometimes blood, with a headache and no memory of what happened but with the _knowledge_ of what must have… It hurt him, and gave him psychological scars he'd _still_ be going to therapists and psychologists for, if his father hadn't hushed the 'incident' up. But it wasn't bad.

After twelve years of working--trying--striving--_pleading_--to be recognized by his father as someone who could be a light of his own, instead of his brother's shadow, someone finally did see him. _Him_--not his brother. _His _work--not reminders of his brother's. _His _face--not his brother's--was the one being caressed. _His _body--not his brother's--was the one being gripped. _His _hair, _his _hands, _his _mouth, _his _being--not his brother's--was the one being pulled, restrained, bit, penetrated. It was _him _who was being seen, and wanted, and appreciated with those sick eyes of Orochimaru's.

Sasuke guessed, that maybe he just so desperately needed some sort of acknowledgment that when Orochimaru kissed him, he accepted _it _as that acknowledgment. That when Orochimaru hit him, he accepted it because Orochimaru was acknowledging that _Sasuke _annoyed him. That when Orochimaru took him, he accepted it because Orochimaru wanted _Sasuke's _body. And when Orochimaru did these enough, and he went back home and his father ignored him, and his mother bragged about his brother's accomplishments to the neighbors, and his brother tried to talk to him and he had to run away because of the shame eating at him…he started to crave Orochimaru's acknowledgment.

Or maybe, maybe, that because he wasn't any good for the family… because he couldn't get his father to be proud of him… because he couldn't give his mother anything she could use as bragging rights among her friends… because he couldn't stand and look his brother in the eye anymore… maybe he didn't _deserve_ any more than what Orochimaru gave him?

Sasuke knew that the logic was twisted, it was wrong, it was bad… he knew that, but he didn't stop thinking that. He didn't stop _wanting_ that.

It was probably how Naruto felt, sometimes.

Like, he had a perfect family. It was home-made, and set in a little box, and wrapped in perfect paper, and topped with a pretty orange--had to be orange--bow. Yet, his mother killed her closest friend and then off-ed herself right afterwards, splitting up that perfect family. Naruto was too young then, to really understand what happened(Sasuke himself just stared in wide-eyed awe at the morning news report). Just three, or four. But as he grew older, he had to, _had to_, think that maybe it was him, that pushed his mother off the diving board.

Four fourteen years, his mother and father--and later his brother--were perfectly fine. And then, when he was so young, she was pushed to the limits. How could it _not_ be his fault, what with all the other kids pointing and whispering and leaving him alone at play-time. Naruto had to have thought that. And then, when he turned fifteen, his brother(Kyuubi; five years older then him, so twenty at the time) went crazy and murdered his father and tried to murder Naruto himself, getting killed in the process. Naruto had to have thought that maybe, maybe if he had been more emphatic to his brother's needs, and wants, and emotional state, maybe he could have helped. Maybe his father would have been alive.

Maybe if he never had been born, then maybe his family would still be perfect.

It was so hard, when you went through those things to accept the logic that, no, your mother was depressed and suffered from a mental disease. No, it's not your fault, your brother skipped the medication he needed for his schizophrenia and let depression and rage overcome him. No, it's not your fault, your father loved you, and it was his decision to pull your crazy brother off of you.

You know it's true, but you can't _accept_ that, no, your teacher is just a pedophile that likes dark-haired boys in need of help. No, it's not your fault, your teacher is a person that your young mind accepts as an authority figure so of course you listened when he said it was okay. No, it's not your fault that you kept it a secret, when you were just listening to the man who held the power. No, it's not your fault that your teacher was taking advantage of a young mind that wanted to surpass his brother… No, you didn't ask for it.

It's hard to accept, Sasuke thought, even if you _know_ the truth.

He wasn't broken, he thought. He wasn't broken, he wasn't shattered by any means. Not yet. His eyes hurt like hell, and his stomach and ribs burned and itched like crazy, yes, but he wasn't broken. He was broken those years ago when he bowed his head and bent over like a whore who didn't know better, but his brother helped pick up and glue those pieces together. With superglue.

He was still fragile… Orochimaru took him and soaked him in nail polish-remover for a good long time, and the glue was un-sticking in some--most--places, but he wasn't broken, not yet. And right now, while his mind wasn't broken, he could accept that yes, he would get hammered, and cracked, and he would shatter by the time Orochimaru was through. But maybe it would be okay, this time, because he knew that his brother would be there to pick up the pieces again, and maybe the prisoner on parole that wrote him letters because he just wanted to talk, and who shared some of his private, personal memories in order to help Sasuke to open up and relax…maybe he would help put the pieces together again, as well.

That's why, when he felt Orochimaru's tongue trace the bruise on his cheek, he didn't move. He waited, and parted his lips and breathed through his nose and waited. He sat, fingers gripping the fabric of his pants so hard he felt the circulation being cut off in their tips, and waited. And waited, and waited when that slithering tongue traced his lips and that slightly chapped mouth moaned. He waited when the tongue pushed passed his lips, and teeth, and danced around his mouth and flicked at his tongue. He waited until the man retreated, mumbling something, and then leaned back and repeated the process. He waited until that fleshy tongue was acting like it wanted to lick the inside of his stomach, or something, before he finally move his hands to gently rest behind Orochimaru's neck.

After the initial gasp of surprise the man let loose, he cautiously let his tongue maneuver around the one inside his mouth. He gently shifted his body so that Orochimaru thought that when he had said, 'Of course not,' when they were conversing, it was in reply to Sasuke's statement--a mocking reply at that--and not that 'are you broken, yet?' question of his. He slipped his hand down Orochimaru's back and tilted his head, and then he bit down, as hard as his weakened state would let him.

He bit down, and when his mouth filled with blood, he dug his nails into the snake's back, and his shot out his leg, glancing off the man's thigh and landing in a spot that would hopefully prevent future generations of little snakes from being born, and ignore the flair of pain that shot through his eyes when Orochimaru's hand brushed against them. He swallowed the screams Orochimaru produced and tore away when the snake's fingernails got to close to his damaged eyes.

When Orochimaru stopped breathing hard, after he backed away in surprise, the cell fell into silence. The blood that Sasuke's mouth filled up with ended up spat onto the cold floor, and dripping down his mouth. It was warm, and wet, and thick, and he didn't like the taste at all. He hated the taste, but he loved the feeling and satisfaction he got with the surprise and shock he could feel. He could feel, with his eyes sowed shut, and his nose clogged with the stench of snake-blood, and his taste buds assaulted with the tang of copper and iron and his throat burned, he could _feel_ the surprise and shock and anger that oozed from Orochimaru's pores.

He could feel the _fear_ that oozed from Orochimaru's pores.

So he smiled the, you-won-that-first-battle-but-I've-won-this-one-and-I-might-loose-the-war-but-goddammit-you're-going-to-_feel_-what-I've-taken-out-of-you-every-waking-moment-and-fuck-that-'so-be-a-good-sport-why-doncha'-and-try-it-on-yourself-smile, which, with all intents and purposes, was much more of a smirk than a smile.

He smirked.

He smirked in what felt like had been a hundred years of smirking celibacy.

And god damn, but it felt good to be smirking again.

He smirked when Orochimaru regained his balance. He smirked when Orochimaru took a menacing step forward. He smirked when he heard a vicious crack and felt his fibula crack and slide and break. He smirked when he felt his face gripped and slammed against wall. He smirked when he felt fumbling fingers dig into his aching, itching sides, and the hem of his smock that Kabuto forced him to wear. He smirked when the scar on his shoulder was re-bitten. He smirked when he finished screaming.

He stopped smirking when he heard the door open and shut.

He stopped smirking when there was nothing but the quietness of the room and the screaming of his leg, and the throb in his lower back to keep him company.

He stopped smirking, because his cheeks were starting to hurt, and his headache was back…

* * *

His prediction was right. He was broken. He hurt, and he was tired and he had a constant head ache. It seemed so much easier to just give in. He didn't; just give in, that is. He held on, through hell of a lot more than he thought he would. It all just blended into each other, and the aches, and pains, and burns he felt were just pushed into a blender and melded into one, constant throb throughout his body. It didn't bother him.

He wouldn't have broken if Orochimaru hadn't seen and concluded that he had just stopped trying to _fight_ and just accepted the pain that came with every session. He had learned to block out the words that the kohai had used to narrate the sessions. His body adapted to the constant pain it was in, and ignored it as well. In fact, without his sight, his brain had much more time to focus on shutting down pain receptors. Or else, the pain just overloaded his nerves and kind of short-circuited them.

But Orochimaru had seen, and he had concluded. So he broke.

Orochimaru let him stew for a very, very long while in that room with the cold floor. There was no outside stimulation, there was no noise. There was nothing. Until that first time, where his ears were assaulted with sound, sound, sound--clanking--banging--clapping--ringing--thrashing--rattling--noise. Then silence. His ears rang, and he felt dizzy, like he was spinning.

It was quiet. Quiet forever.

Then more noise.

Then quiet.

Then noise.

_Quiet_.

_Quiet_.

**NOISE!**

_Quiet_.

_Quiet_.

_Quiet_.

**NOISE!**

_Quiet_.

**NOISE!**

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

**NOISE!**

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

**NOISE!**

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

**NOISE!**

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

_Quiet…_

The door opened. The clicking sound of it sent a shock through Sasuke's ears.

Almost silent footfalls sounded like bricks falling from two stories up.

The soft ruffling of clothes shifting against itself was echoing inside Sasuke's head.

The low, hushed breathing sounded like roaring.

"Sasuke-kun,"

He flinched at the bellow in his ear.

"Good, good, Sasuke-kun, but get used to it,"

His breathing quickened, but he didn't flinch again. The voice was quieting to a dull rumble, and the tone wasn't loud at all. It was almost soothing. Scales overlapping water.

"There's a good boy, Sasuke-kun," Accompanied by a pat on the head, the praise was a golden light in Sasuke's blinded world. So he struggled to get his senses under control, and please the voice. It was a nice voice. Deep, kind of raspy but not quite. It was a good voice to listen to.

"Keh-keh, keep this up and we'll see progress," There was an affectionate ruffling of his matted hair, and even if it stung the roots that were kept in the same position to long, it was welcome contact. Sasuke nuzzled the comforting hand.

"There, there, pet. I'll see you tomorrow,"

Sasuke frowned with the hand, and the voice started leaving. He frowned harder when the voice let out that strange laugh that sounded like coughing…

"Don't worry, the way things seem to be going, you'll break sooner then I hoped, and I'll be right back," Those words didn't sound right. The touched something in his mind. A memory.

It wasn't good, it didn't belong with that voice… or did it? It was an odd voice, almost artificial, now that he thought of it… it was almost fake, and constructed…and slithery…

Slithery…

But then the door shut and it was quiet.

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

**NOISE!**

**NOISE!**

_Quiet._

**NOISE!**

It wasn't quiet, because he was yelling. He was yelling and demanding, and god, he just wanted it to be over! Just… Over. He wanted normal sounds. The sounds that blended into the background until it seemed quiet. He wanted T.V noised talking at him, or birds singing, chirping. He wanted an annoying dog to start yapping. The sounds of cars driving by, or just the sound of wind through leaves. He just wanted _something_!

The door clicked open again and that voice…

"Sasuke-kun?"

"Y--yes…"

Hell, if the voice wanted him to be Sasuke-kun (was he Sasuke-kun? He remembered that… he thinks) then he would be Sasuke-kun.

"Don't yell, so much, okay? We're progressing, yes?"

"Uh… 'kay," He nodded so hard and fast, his head was dizzy. But progress was good, right? Progressing would mean he got out of this hell-hole faster, right? He wouldn't yell.

"Good, good, Sasuke-kun, I'll be back later,"

And the door clicked shut. And Sasuke was so disappointed because the voice didn't touch him! He praised him, but there was no pat. There was nothing. Maybe he wasn't good enough? For some reason, that tugged at him. That hurt him, but he didn't know why.

And the quiet came back…

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

_Quiet._

**NOISE!**

_Quiet._

But it wasn't quiet. He wasn't yelling, or demanding. That was bad. Instead he let himself cry. He cried, tears streaming down his cheeks, and he didn't know why his eyes stung so much. He couldn't see, but maybe he never saw, and his eyes stung with his tears. There might have been something. Wire, tears, blood, pain, stinging… but the door clicked open as he was pleading and the voice came back.

"Sasuke-kun,"

"Yes?" Yes, yes, that was him. He remembers that. He does.

"Look, you've been a good boy,"

Sasuke felt himself smile.

"Yes, yes, so I can take you out of here,"

"Really?" Because that didn't seem real, that was such a good thing!

"Yes, Sasuke-kun, now don't interrupt,"

Sasuke nodded and flushed, hotter than he already felt.

"Good, now come on," The body that belonged to the voice helped him up, and he winced when he put his weight on his legs. They almost buckled, and one of them shot a spear of fire through his body. So his nerves weren't fried. Fried? Why would they be fried?

He pushed the thought to the back of his mind when he let out a keening whimper. Though he hurriedly stifled the sound, he was afraid that maybe the voice would have taken the involuntary action as another interruption. The man's bated breath had sounded like he was going to start talking again. He really, really didn't want the voice to be mad at him, he really didn't.

The hands that belonged to the voice were gripping his shoulders, steadying him as he tottered, shifting his weight to his uninjured leg. Long, thin fingers felt like ice on his fevered skin, and the palms pressed flush to him spread a seeping chilliness. Those hands felt like they _should_ be cold, it just felt right, somehow. He didn't know why, but he knew that those hands should be cold. It was a disappointment when he realized they were warm, that first time, but it was better now because they were cold.

'First time'? When had the voice touched him first?

"Come on, follow me," Sasuke nodded and followed the voice, relieved that it didn't sound annoyed, only rather amused.

Amused; that felt wrong, for some reason. Why should the voice be amused?

He winced and whined again as his hurt leg shifted; the bones slid against each other and poked his skin where he knew that his skin shouldn't be poked. It burned. It burned so badly. More then burned, really. It felt swollen, and like there was a two-ton weight pressing razor sharp barbed-wire into the skin. Every time he moved—even a little bit—he felt pain claw its way up his side and back, and into his skull, fueling a throbbing headache since that snake threw him into the damn room.

Snake…?

Too many thoughts were whirling in his head. Vague dream-like thoughts, memories… But they couldn't be memories. He didn't _remember_ any of it, so it couldn't have happened. Everything was just the quiet, quiet, intermeshed with random cacophony of sound. He'd become acquainted with his heart beat, and the pulsing of his blood through his body. The only things he'd known were the stinging in his eyes—or where his eyes should be?—and the freezing air he'd felt at all times.

The voice—snake—serpent—_devil —_nudged him again and he felt screaming terror shoot up his leg, and he collapsed, pulling the unidentified entity down with him.

"What the fuck, you brat?!"

Sasuke whimpered, but it wasn't because the voice was yelling at him. Fire was eating his leg; it was burning, the flames licking at his flesh. The rest of his body felt like a block of ice, but his leg burned like the sun. He thrashed and cried—he was sure it was crying, but some part of him refused to admit it—and yelled out his pain. He felt the voice move back and call something that the throbbing in his head didn't allow him to hear.

In what seemed eternities later, there was what felt like acid dripping down his leg, and he screamed. The voice hissed at him, something that was lost beneath the white noise that was filling his ears. The intensity of the pain chased everything out of his mind, and all he could think of was the fire burning him until he wasn't just thinking it, he _was_ the pain.

There were freezing hands that didn't belong to the voice touching him, and prodding the coals and embers of the inferno in his leg. It felt like every poke was a gust of wind that fueled the throbbing. But then—

--his mind went blank.

The pain sent his mind to a different level; it could be likened to a fire burning everything to ashes in a stone room. His mind was the stone room and his thoughts were now the ashes. Something moved under the ashes, something old, yet new. This situation was wrong, _this _was wrong, the thing was saying.

The voice wasn't a comfort, it wasn't good. There were snakes all around, snakes everywhere, and little beetles with shiny pieces of glass, and it wasn't good. The voice of that thing told him.

Sasuke had enough time to become weary, before the edges of the now ash-covered stone room grew black. He swore—knew it wasn't physical, but a mental image—that he saw a pair of yellow, reptilian eyes glaring at him before he passed out. A single thought, that was his but wasn't, came unbidden from the darkness:

He was broken now.

And he was alright with it.

* * *

::His memory was back::

_it was because he was going insane_

::That he forgot what had happened::

_and his eyes were sowed shut_

::It hurt everyday to move::

_he was seriously shattered now_

::Wasn't he?::

_it was Thursday_

::It was Friday::

_it was Saturday_

::It was Sunday::

_they blended into each other_

::He didn't care::

_it didn't matter_

_He was always there._

::Always was there a snake waiting::

_always, and it hurt_

::But it didn't matter::

_Not yet_

::Not now::

_Maybe later, though_

_but _he_ was there, too_

::Blond, blue, and a prison jump-suit::

_blond, orange, and a hospital gown_

::_It _didn't matter yet::

_because something else did_

* * *

The cold silk of the bed he was lying on was getting caught on the rough bandages he had wrapped around his stomach and back. His leg—which he learned had had an infection—was now splinted and rested on a pillow. To his right, on a stand, lay a tray of deliciously roasted chicken, fresh green beans, mash potatoes cooked with _real_ milk, butter and salt. He had a glass of the highest grade wine, imported from Greece. He still couldn't see, and the only reason he knew the food was there, was because his sense of smell had gotten better, somehow. He wasn't sure if he liked that.

The whole set up was a sham.

Orochimaru wanted him complacent and satiated. After the indeterminable amount of time he spent on the examination table and solitary confinement, he had lost a large part of him that made up his will to resist and fight back.

The time was still lost to him, but it had been a very long time since he'd been in that cold, silent, room. That meant--by the reflexive postulate--that it had been a very, very long time since he was on the examination table, and a very, very, very long time since he was in that hospital, talking about _Polpo con Limone e Aglio_, and seeing Suigetsu, die before his eyes.

The soft click of the door opening had him turn his head towards the entrance.

There was only one person who would enter the bedroom alone.

The _pfffft_ of shoes sinking into a plush carpet caught his attention as it steadily came closer. They stopped at his right. There was a dip into the mattress he was lying on.

"Sasuke-kun, are your feeling well?" The words were concerned, but not the tone.

"Yes, I'm fine, Orochimaru…sama," He added the suffix after a pause that would indicate that he had forgotten to.

"Well, why haven't you eaten this?"

"I'm not hungry, Orochimaru…sama," He would just throw everything back up, anyways.

"That's a shame, Kabuto cooked this himself,"

Well, maybe it wasn't roasted chicken, then. It might be a part of some, poor, wretched fool who hadn't paid Orochimaru his money. Though, Sasuke had heard that human meat smelt and tasted like pork.

"I'm sorry, I'm sure that it is very delicious,"

"Well, I can think of something more delicious," Orochimaru let the statement hang in the air before shifting the covers over Sasuke down.

Sasuke sighed. He never looked forward to this, maybe if he had still been than submissive little wretch he'd been in the solitary cell, but not now.

Orochimaru started to take off whatever it was he wore. A hand--back to a clammy warmth--traced his neck and collar bone, and it took all he had not to flinch away from the touch. From the slight kiss of fabric against his bare legs, he assumed that Orochimaru had slipped off a robe. The sudden naked skin coming into contact with his thighs--and the obviously bared, long, hard arousal that was lying against him--confirmed that the snake was now completely naked.

There was nipping at his mouth, a long tongue stroked and his chin, and cheeks, and then his lips, forcing its way through. He relented quite easily, not in the mood to upset his stomach more, or give himself a bigger headache. The tongue nearly choked him, and teeth caught his lips and tongue and hurt. There was a slightly bitter taste, that was new, but it receded quickly as the long tongue licked at him.

Hands slid over his skin, purposely prodding his healing wounds, causing him to shift and bow his back in discomfort. Nails teased his skin, along his ribs, stomach, pectorals, neck, nipples, naval. A rhythmic thrusting and grinding started, and--despite himself--he felt himself get hard.

For a split second, he tried to force the arousal away, bring his guard back up, but at the same, Orochimaru dug his nail into an almost closed wound and ground his erecting against Sasuke's.

The pain and pleasure twined and he stopped trying to resist the tiny amount that he was. It really was better if he tried to enjoy what was being done to him now, then it would be to resist.

After Orochimaru deemed him ready--which meant hard and aching--the snake bastard quickly forced him around, so he was lying on his stomach. He was manipulated so that his weight was resting on his elbows and knees, while his ass was in the air, and his head was pressed into the mattress. A possessive, heavy hand gripped his hair and his was entered suddenly, without any lube or preparation. He gave a muffled scream.

It was what happened every time.

Orochimaru got him hard--some days it took longer then others--entered him, made him orgasm in a humiliating way (don't touch yourself, spread your legs, just lie there like the dog you are…)(ride me, face away, but do it hard, you slut)(put your hands on the floor, legs straight, and do the work--he'd almost passed out from all the blood rushing to his head.), and then fucked him until he screamed from the pain of it and begged until his voice was hoarse.

It wasn't very pleasant.

He didn't like it.

He _didn't _like--love--want--_crave_--it.

The pain and humiliation. He didn't deserve it. He didn't need it. He wasn't a masochistic sub.

He almost had himself convinced. Though only time he didn't immerse himself in the psychological/therapeutic mantra was when he was dreaming and he was plagued by the thoughts and feelings he couldn't shut out.

He'd been there a very long time.

No one had come for him yet.

He almost believed no one would.

It would be better that way. Orochimaru's men would kill a lot of the people who attempted the rescue. He didn't want anyone who went after _his_ pathetic life to die.

A part of him thought that maybe no one noticed he was gone. He _was_ taking a vacation, maybe everyone who thought he was still on it. It got extended, or something. Hadn't he been here longer then that, though?

And at least two people knew he was gone.

Itachi and--

--And Naruto.

Maybe he wasn't missed, then?

That was illogical, he knew. His brother came for him last time, what would stop him this time? Of course, he hardly ever showed his brother appreciation for the times that the older man had lent him a hand, or tried to help him out. Maybe Itachi had had enough of his bastard-like tendencies?

And Naruto… Sasuke had been the judge to put him away. They didn't know each other that well. So what if Naruto had told him that he missed his brother and father. So what if Sasuke had told Naruto that he didn't miss his father, but he'd always felt bad about disappointing his mother. So what if Sasuke made lunch almost everyday for Naruto.

They didn't really know each other, and Sasuke had been the one to make Naruto a target. If he was Naruto, he wouldn't go after himself either. If their places were switched, of course Sasuke would go after Naruto--Naruto wasn't him, Naruto was Naruto. He was someone who _deserved_ to be saved.

Sasuke understood.

Orochimaru grunted, and Sasuke realized that he had been crying, and that his throat was scratchy. He didn't remember anything, but he felt the oozing warmth drip down his ass and his thighs. He felt the twinge of discomfort--it didn't register on his pain scale anymore--as Orochimaru pulled out of him. He rolled back over, and stared, blankly, at the back of his eyelids, pretending it was the ceiling. Or the night sky.

* * *

He was sleeping, when a subtle smell seeped into his nostrils. It was smoke, and for a moment, he thought he was back on that examination table, with that creepy kohai person standing over him. But the soft silkiness of the mattress exposed the reality. He sat up, ignoring the pain spreading through his back. Was that _fire?_

The possessive arm around him shifted, and the smell of smoke became stronger. There was yelling and shouts, now as well. The steady breathing beside him announced that Orochimaru had not yet woken up. His nose wasn't as sensitive as Sasuke's.

The sheer oddness of the activity kept Sasuke rooted to his spot. He knew that if this was some sort of raid on Orochimaru by some other gang, or something, Orochimaru would protect him. Or at least kill him quickly and painlessly. It was better than being abducted by people who weren't interested in the fight he could give, or the pride they should feel if he submitted to him, and were only going to use him for as long as he was tight enough to satisfy them.

There was more shouting, and footsteps, and then the smoke got stronger. The door opened with a slam. There was a shout, and the arm around him tightened painfully, and he was pulled against the naked torso of Orochimaru. Long, thick hair draped over his shoulders.

"Orochimaru-sama!" Sasuke knew that voice. It was the voice of the kohai that cut him open.

"Orochimaru-sama! There is an attack!" The man sounded urgent, but strangely calm about the entire thing. It was unnerving.

The arm gripped him harder, and his bandages were irritating him, under the weight and pressure. He heard the kohai come closer, and felt a hand on his shoulder. He followed along with the nudges, the grip transferred from Orochimaru's hand to the other's, until he was standing, naked, and Orochimaru stood behind him.

He heard the footsteps before Orochimaru or the kohai did. There were two sets, one farther ahead then the other. They were approaching rather quickly. Before he could take another step forward, the door slammed open once again, and he felt Orochimaru stiffen behind him.

"Sa-Sasu-ke?"


	4. The happy Ending Everybody Wants

**[AN: Warnings: **(don't let the title fool you!) drug abuse. Emotional Abuse.

**Rating: M or T+**

**Note: **Finally! God, what time is it? 1:13, and I finally finish. Go number 13!**]**

.: Finale :: Fois :.

.: The :: Happy :: Ending :: Everyone :: Wants :: Probably :.

Words: 3,032

There were times Sasuke had nightmares.

Sometimes it was about him failing at his job. It wasn't really feasible, now, since he'd retired as soon as he came back from his 'vacation'. But, he used to worry about that all the time, and he was an insecure person. The system let him retire with barely a fight. Sometimes he thought it was because he hadn't been good enough. These ones made him wake up, feeling irritable and craving coffee. He snapped a lot, as well.

Other times, Sasuke had nightmares about being an inadequate brother. Itachi was thirty-eight, now. He was promoted, and offered the highest position there was in the city police department, but he had declined, saying he wanted to stay in the field and protect the city through action, not paperwork. He was currently a detective. Sasuke was grateful, for everything his brother did. He knew he didn't show it often enough. He also knew his brother understood. He still thought he was a bad brother. He was often irritable, when he had these dreams. He spent a good two hours just reading, to clear the irritation away.

He also had nightmares about his parents. He never had made up with his father, and he was terrified he wouldn't make up with him before the old man died. Of course his father was far from the death bed, but they were both so stubborn. Sasuke didn't entirely forgive his father, and his father never quite approved of him, but it made his mother depressed when they fought, and didn't make-up. He kept dreaming that she, or he would die, and her face would frown at him as he worked his way through life, accusing him of being shallow, emotionless, and a disappointment. These ones were the kind where he woke up, sweating, with a deep, shallow kind of ache. He wouldn't go to sleep after those.

Other nightmares were of the kind where he woke up screaming, shaking, and clawing at his eyes. These were often memories of the three months he had spent under Orochimaru's _care_. It seemed so much longer, then it actually was, and Sasuke had a lingering, unfounded suspicion that people started counting at leas two months _after_ he'd been kidnapped. After those nightmares, he would take fast-working, psychiatrist prescribed sleeping pills that stopped him from dreaming.

The last nightmares where the ones were he woke up, eyes wide, covered in a cold sheen of sweat, trembling slightly. He never screamed, he never got out of bed, and he never told any one about them. He couldn't get back to sleep after those ones.

Two and a half months after his retrieval and recovery in the hospital, Naruto had been released of parole. Itachi and Sasuke pulled strings, and bribed and Naruto was a free man.

It took another half a month before Naruto knocked on his door and moved in with him. There was no preconceived plan, there wasn't any discussion, and it was just in the middle of the night. Naruto showed up, with a suitcase, and waited for Sasuke to let him in. Sasuke did. He told Naruto to sleep on the couch for now, until Sasuke could find the other mattress in the next few days.

Naruto had a strange sixth sense when it came to Sasuke's dreams.

When Sasuke would wake with the failure dreams, Naruto would have already made coffee--having gotten up an hour before he usually did--and have breakfast started. Sasuke's headache usually dissipated after three cups.

When Sasuke had the anxious dreams towards his brother, Naruto would get up an hour later than normal--after Sasuke had read all he could--and suggest a movie they could watch. Sasuke usually said no, but ended up sitting on the couch, eating popcorn, while Naruto convinced Itachi to get some more chips a few hours later.

When Sasuke woke up because of the disappointment dreams, Naruto was up with him. They didn't talk, but Naruto would be up, and close enough near-by that Sasuke could feel his presence. It made him content, and he didn't feel alone as he refused to sleep.

When Sasuke woke screaming, Naruto would wait until Sasuke was finished, and would enter the room, like nothing happened, and plop into his bed, hold out Sasuke medication, and stay with him until he fell asleep. It hurt Sasuke's pride that Naruto kept seeing him like that, but the ex-convict always left a moment before Sasuke woke up, so he woke up with the sheets warm from someone else, but almost able to convince himself it was a dream that someone stayed by him.

When Sasuke woke without a sound, Naruto would be moving in the kitchen. He never came in, he never asked, and he never tried to talk to him about it. Sasuke was okay with that. If Naruto came in during the after-math of one of _those_ dreams, he didn't know what would happen.

He found out, three months after Naruto moved in, what would happen.

* * *

"Sa-Sasu-ke?"

The voice was familiar. He recognized it--he'd recognize it anywhere. Deep, raspy, with so much emotion. It had to be Naruto.

Orochimaru stiffened, and wrapped his arm back around Sasuke's waist, pulling him closer, with a possessive, reptilian hiss. Sasuke could imagine that lone tongue flicking out of his mouth at Naruto, like a snake's.

"Let him go," Naruto's voice was calm, but Sasuke could hear the restrained emotions in it. It made him confusingly pleased to hear that inflection.

"Why should I? He's mine," There was a dark chuckle, and a dangerous growl that permeated the air at the same time.

"Who said he was yours?" Naruto's voice held a dark, threatening edge.

"Me," The syllable was drawn out and whispered, before a shock of wetness traced the pale scar on Sasuke's shoulder, before teeth sank into it once again.

He barely flinched.

"What the _fuck_?" Naruto was growling.

Orochimaru just pulled back and smirked--Sasuke could hear it once again.

"He's not the Sasuke you know, anymore. He's _my _Sasuke. He does what _I_ say,"

"Like Hell--"

"Watch," Orochimaru's voice demanded to be listened to, "Sasuke-kun,"

Sasuke turned his head lightly in Orochimaru's direction. The tone of voice informed him that he wasn't going to like whatever he'd be asked. He felt eyes raking his body, and he realized just how naked--open--vulnerable--_wanting_--he was right now.

Something in Naruto's voice had uncorked a damn inside of him, and he felt self-loathing to his very core. However, instead of pulling away, something sick, twisted, and masochistic inside him made him turn towards the source, and went back for more punishment. It was like he _wanted_ to be humiliated. Which wasn't right, and it wasn't him. He _wanted_ to listen to the persuasive voice, and that definitely wasn't right.

He remembered the bitter taste of this kiss, and decided that Orochimaru had gave him something. It would be just like the snake-bastard to know that Naruto was coming and prepare for it, then act like he didn't.

"Sasuke-kun, down,"

Sasuke's body immediately responded, despite his wishes, and he dropped to his knees in front of the snake.

"Sasuke--"

"Sasuke-kun," It was a silent command, and, just like before, Sasuke's body complied before he knew what he was doing.

Without being able to see, he found it ridiculously easy to find the already erect cock before him with his hands, with little fumbling. His hands were shaking, and his brows were furrowed, but he couldn't make himself stop.

He slowly moved forward--

"Sasuke!"

--and wrapped his mouth around the head of Orochimaru's erection.

He wasn't exactly the most experienced in giving head, Orochimaru preferred more humiliating ways of copulating, but he was good enough, he supposed. And it wasn't like it mattered how good he was right now, this was a display of power, and Orochimaru was reveling in it. He slowly swallowed more--

"Sasuke?!"

--and his hands clenched at not being able to stop his body. He couldn't pull back, he couldn't stop. He felt indescribably pathetic, and he felt his body flush with embarrassment and shame. The confused, doubtful tone Naruto's voice had held hadn't helped much. God, he just hoped that Itachi wasn't anywhere near. It would kill him.

"See? Sasuke-kun is my Sasuke, not your Sasuke," Orochimaru's hand drifted down to press against the bite on his shoulder. He flinched, and then he swallowed deeper, squinting his eyes shut in displeasure.

Orochimaru jerked out of his mouth abruptly and came on his face.

The semen dripped down his cheeks, lips, chin, and dribbled down his neck. He stayed in the same position.

"Fuck, you bastard!"

"Ku-Ku-Ku, Sasuke-kun,"

Sasuke lifted his head.

"Aren't you pretty? Clean yourself,"

If Sasuke's eyes hadn't been sowed shut, he'd have blinked dazedly, before sitting back on his feet and using his hand to slowly gather the liquid on him. He knew what Orochimaru expected and licked the dirty hand clean. His shame grew at the indignant noise Naruto made.

He once again heard the footsteps before anyone else, and shifted his head towards the door.

What happened next was so fast.

The door opened, and Sasuke heard Itachi's voice yelling, and there was a disgustingly loud--

_--IckWAH--_

--sound and a exclamation from Kabuto, before there was slumping. At the same time, Sasuke felt a movement on the other side of him, and there was a loud gunshot--his ears popped at the noise. He felt warm liquid spill onto him, staining his face and the white fluid already there. Orochimaru fell to his knees and slumped onto him. There was a shaking breath, and the man died, almost literally in his arms.

The kohai, roughly pulled him and wrapped a robe around him, and shoved him to the corner of the room. The smell of smoke was getting thicker.

Sasuke listened to what the man who had tortured him said, and let his hands feel the walls of the bedroom. They flitted over books and trinkets and baubles and gewgaws. Finally, they found a small hairline crack that was too straight to be a crack. He slipped a fingernail into it, felt it hit something, and the wall and bookcase he was leaning on swung open, making him loose his balance.

He felt arms catch him--warm--comforting--strong--_safe_--arms and steady him.

"Come on, Sasuke, we have to get out of here!" That was Naruto.

The smell of smoke and fire burned at his nostrils. He nodded and started when another presence brushed against him. He relaxed almost immediately when he recognized the scent of his brother--he hadn't known he knew the scent of his brother--and leaned into the man.

He followed Naruto and Itachi through the dark tunnel--it might not have been dark, but most escape tunnels were, so he assumed again--until they finally stopped, and he felt warmth on his skin.

He flinched when a hand brushed against his cheek, but he didn't move away.

When they urged him to follow them some more, though, to get in the car and go home… he hesitated then.

Naruto was especially persistent, but how could he? How could he still want to help get Sasuke home? He witnessed when Sasuke followed the snake's orders, and didn't hesitate once. How could the idiot still help him?

"Because that isn't Sasuke. Right now, you aren't Sasuke, and I want Sasuke back,"

It took him a minute, but he figured that he had spoken aloud.

"You did, you bastard,"

It appeared he was still doing it.

"Sasuke, hurry home, I want you to cook some more ramen,"

He remembered what the kohai had said…

'_See, you taste like ashes and tears now… ashes for renewal, tears for purity…'_

And Sasuke let himself be led by Naruto and his brother.

And he woke up.

* * *

He still hadn't cooked ramen for the moron yet, he thought, as he tried to still his shaking. He hadn't cooked at all, he didn't trust himself not to go suicidal, yet. There was to many things to do, to be tempted by the stove's flame, or a knife.

And he didn't like doing things that involved heavy usage of his eyes. After almost four months with no exposure to stimuli, his eyes were still sensitive when it came to those things.

His eyes held tints of red in them now, the wire had scratched his cornea, and the doctors couldn't do anything about it. He had permanent scars, disrupting the flow of his eyelashes, and his tears were often tinged with blood from where his tear ducts had been damaged with the needle.

He hated to look at himself, now. All he saw was a pale body covered in a snake's markings. Scars, stitches, bandages, gauze, all acting like targets to what Orochimaru did to him. There wasn't anything the doctors could do for the scar on his shoulder, either. It would always be there. Forever a reminder that he had been Orochimaru's _pet_. He hated it. He hated himself.

He was shaking, and his head hurt, and at times like these, he couldn't help but wonder why Naruto didn't hate him. Why the idiot didn't leave, or move out. Why he kept helping him.

'_Because that isn't Sasuke. Right now, you aren't Sasuke, and I want Sasuke back,'_

The words couldn't be anymore truer than the claims you made in fourth grade with your friends--(Of course I'm gonna go to your party)--fails to show up--(He so likes you, go for it)--heart is broken--(yeah, the shirt looks fine)--it had a stain--but it still almost brought a smile to Sasuke's face.

He didn't believe it, but he'd like to pretend he could.

When he heard the soft click of his door opening, he jerked his head up to see Naruto slip inside.

"Sasuke?"

His voice was hesitant, and maybe that's what stopped Sasuke from going into a spiral of despair and anguish. Or maybe he was finally getting over it.

"Uh…ye- what do you want… Idiot?" He added the insult last minute.

"Che, bastard. Happy birthday,"

"What?"

"It's your birthday,"

"It is?"

"June 23rd, right?"

"Yeah…hn," So, with everything going on, he'd forgotten his birthday was today… that didn't mean Naruto had to snicker like that.

"Look, I was thinking we could go out, I don't know, watch that new movie… Avatar, or whatever,"

"Avatar?"

"Yeah, it's supposed to be cool,"

"Whatever,"

Naruto slipped onto the bed and put and arm around Sasuke's shoulder, his hand brushed against the scar on it and Sasuke flinched.

Naruto's look held a bit of surprise, but he held Sasuke from jerking away.

"Let me see that,"

"What?"

"Let me see that,"

Sasuke looked warily at Naruto. He didn't want to, that scar was extremely degrading… but Naruto looked determined, and Naruto hadn't asked him to do anything before, and he'd basically saved his life so…

Sasuke shifted and exposed the scar. He kept his eyes down and fought the shame clawing its way up his neck and cheeks, trying to paint them red. Careful fingers skirted around the perimeter of the scar, and traced it. Naruto spent at least seven minutes studying the scar, Sasuke started to get nervous.

"I got it!"

Sasuke jerked back.

"You've got what?"

"Your birthday gift,"

"What?"

* * *

How the Hell Sasuke got to be in a tattoo parlor, he'll never know. Why he was, well, that was pretty easy. Naruto was adamant that Sasuke get a birthday present--apparently turning 24 was a huge deal--and kidnapped him. Now he was standing here, looking with distaste at the different sketches of designs that made him cringe with the thought of a needle inking it on his skin. What a tattoo had to do with his scar, he didn't know.

Naruto was talking to the owner of the store. Sasuke walked over to them, and was shocked when Naruto pulled down his collar and showed the owner his scar.

"Oh, that's not that bad, from the way you described it, I'd have thought it'd be worse,"

"I just wanted to make sure…"

"Well, it can definitely be done, if your friend doesn't mind a little pain?"

Sasuke was feeling a little irritated--furious--that Naruto had just went and shown his scar--the one that was so humiliating to him--to a complete stranger, but the question surprised him.

"What?"

"A little pain, you know? The scar tissue isn't very sensitive, so it won't be much, but the new tissue around it will probably hurt more when I ink it,"

" 'Ink it'?"

"Yes… put a tattoo on it, that's what you wanted, right?"

Sasuke stared wide eyed and the artist, and then at Naruto. He blinked his eyes, realization dawning on him. Naruto looked down.

"It's just… you're always really…insecure about it… and I get why, it's just… You're _you,_ Sasuke. A stupid scar you never volunteered for doesn't mean anything. You don't belong to anyone. You're _you, _and you deserve to be free. That whole renewal from the ashes, or something like that…"

Sasuke blushed. Lightly, but it was still there.

Naruto was right, he did deserve to be free… or, at least he could work towards deserving it. He wanted…not to cover that scar up, that would be hiding it, and from his past. He wanted to show that it was a part of him, an involuntary part, but still a part of him, and who he was. There was something he read about once, an image… he thought would look nice, and it would fit within the circle of teeth marks, so the scar wouldn't be hiding.

That would be perfect.

And maybe he'd get another tattoo.

A phoenix? That'd be good, too.

"Naruto," he started slowly.

"Uhm, yeah?"

"Do you want ramen or yakitori for lunch, today?"

Naruto's face had split into a wide smile before he even finished the sentence.

"What do you think, ass?"

"Yakitori it is, then!"

"Ack! No! You bastard, give me ramen! I haven't had any in forever!"

"Total moron,"

"Jerk!"

"Hn,"

"Hey, Sasuke-bastard,"

"What?"

"You're back?"

"Hn. What do you think, looser?"

"I think I'm gonna get a tattoo, too!"

"Complete idiot."

.: Le :: Fin :.

**[AN:: **if anyone can guess who the Kohai and the Tatto artist are, I'll write a one shot for them... with their promtp... if they want. Yeah. The first three or four...**]**


End file.
